confessions of a missionary in Brazil

confessions of ....coming back..

2010-02-08T13:39:00.000-08:00

I've been so terrible at this blogging thing....for a long time. And I apologize for this shortcoming. I can give a million excuses, but the truth being told-God is using me and has given me many opportunities to serve the ministries He has set before me for this year. My nights are full of serving the International Jr. High Girls (whom I LOVE), attending a Brasilian Bible Study, SMASH (the international student ministry we have every friday night), staff fellowships, and running almost daily with my roommate, Lauren. The Leadership of SMASH also meets every Sunday afternoon to prepare for the Smash meetings-to talk about the student, and to begin to go through "Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life" by Donald Whitney AND to go through a book of the Bible together. I work with the most amazing people! Our student ministry goes up and down-we are facing many barriers with the students-them being lackluster in their faith and just indifferent to the things of the Lord. We're continually surprised by their attitudes and just praying that God sends a revival to our school. We need it desperately in our student body.

On that note-our school continues to grow, but we are also losing students at the same time-seemingly very sudden for the last month. Many of our African families are sending their sons back to their home countries to attend boarding schools with families. Their embassy's are having problems affording even "sending" their families home. Some situations are just very difficult and unique. Many of these African families are torn apart by the job opportunities for husbands and wives. I have a five year old that is suffering the loss of his mother....the opportunities are so good for him here, but the sacrifice is that she has to live there while he lives here with his father. He misses his mom so very much-I can see it in his crocodile tears about every other day.

I recently started a Bible passage memorization self proclaimed plan. We are going through 1 Timothy in our leadership group-so each week I take 4-6 verses and memorize them from that chapter. I don't think I've ever felt the urgency to memorize in this way. I am finding myself enjoying the time I have in the word and on the meditation of the verses in hopes that I can hide them in my heart for conviction, for counseling, and to glorify the Lord. It is good to be able to quote scripture to yourself....to have your sword in your head. =)

Please pray for our school. Next year will be a big year for us. We will welcome a completely new administration including the Curriculum Coordinator, Principal, and Business Manager positions. This is almost every position we have on the Administration team. I know God is already working in those that He wants here. He has called me here for at least another year and I feel extremely blessed. I reiterate that I think about going home, but I dream about staying here.

Incredibly, God is allowing me to adapt to many different things. He continues to teach me and guide me through His Word and many corrections of sin that surfaces as I face trials. Please pray that I can encourage people here and love them like He would love them. I'm praying that I can see people in this way-the way He does and point them to Him. I mean, that's the only reason I am on this earth. So why is it so hard sometimes? In our society,self centeredness is like a virtue now....fight it, fight it, fight it....with godliness which should be God centered and therefore caring for others more than myself....a mystery indeed how...

He was manifested in the flesh, vindicated by the Spirit, seen by angels, proclaimed to all the nations, believed on in the world, taken up to glory.

How I cannot wait to see him....to know more of this mystery!

confessions on that last post....

2009-11-29T06:45:00.000-08:00

so-I poured my frustrations into a short poem-if you could call it that.....

because I could not express how much last week hurt. It hurt to hear the

coaching she is receiving in her home and how they've told her that she is

not to pray anymore.

they are such an incredible family and they really love BIS (they've told us

numerous times) but they are waging war against God. That, my friends, breaks

my heart. I remember last Friday as I sat at my desk as I realized (as I often do)

how great God is and that I need to be praying more for this family.

There are many reasons for us to be praying and God is using these reasons to

bring us to our knees and earnestly cry out to him for reconciliation, wisdom,

understanding, freedom from fear, and many other things.

Our staff is burdened with what is going to happen in the next few weeks as we will start to say our goodbyes to 2 staff members. This issue alone is causing many people stress as well as a blanket of anxiety amongst some of them. Our administration is seeking the Lord in all of these things-but I can't imagine what they are dealing with at this time. I am very impressed with their communication and how they've gone about this. It can't be easy to have started the school year with a full staff only to let 2 of them go.

Riding on the tails of all of this came the sad news of cancer. Our Biology Teacher, Beverly Fryar (who is an amazing and dear friend of mine) received a phone call that her mother has cancer. The test results have been coming back with more and more serious tones. Beverly is a cancer survivor herself and worked as an oncology nurse before she came to BIS. All of this knowledge creates a good foundation for next steps, treatments, and also the understanding of the severity of her disease. Please pray for them as they discern what God is leading and directing them to do. Mr. Fryar is our Business Manager and their son, Caleb, is a very important part of his 1st grade classroom. Mr. Fryar is also the Youth Minister for the International Baptist Church. They are and have been such a blessing in my life. They are always there to encourage me, give me rides, let me borrow their car, and really pouring into my life here. They've been been sent to pour into my life using scripture, love, joy, hope, and comfort to name a few. Please pray for them during this time.

I received a new student-little (really really tall) Betuel. He is really really SWEET! He knows little to no English and he is from Namibia. He is beginning to come out of the silent stage and explore with lots more curiousity! I am excited to be working with him. Please pray for quick understanding of English and learning his alphabet to catch up with his classmates. =)

Our annual Christmas Program is coming up-a clear presentation of the Gospel to all families. They will come to see their children perform and in the midst-they will hear about Jesus. We will perform "The Christmas Lamb" this year. A little boy goes all over the world looking for the Jesus. We get to spotlight each continent (which is neat with the unique make up of our school). Please pray that I will help the students understand the real meaning of Christmas-that they can recognize Jesus' Birth as the true meaning of Christmas. I've been reading a book by Noel Piper "Treasuring God in Our Traditions" and I've gotten several ideas to use with my students.

Speaking of reading, I also read, "Faithful Women & Their Extraordinary God" also by Noel Piper. She highlights some amazing women and it made me realize and re-realize many things about this life. This book helped me understand how they were so faithful in their sufferings and even looked forward/prepared for sufferings. Oh how I can learn from that.

Abba, Father,
You know the cries and different types of pain that these requests bring to my life. Some pain comes in rejoicing over a believer who will show Your glory in suffering.....and some will come with a response in many prayers for wisdom, comfort, and peace. Thank you for Your hope, for Your comfort, and for Your Son. I don't know what I would do without him. Thank you for choosing me and for loving me. Thank you for my beautiful parents through whom you sent some books to help me. Thank you for faithful prayer warriors and friends. Thank you for 17 days to focus on Jesus and how He began his human life. Please help my classroom and my life to be centered around Him. You are doing so much in life-please continue to discipline and show me how You want me to live.
Amen.

2009-11-20T17:28:00.000-08:00

"I am not Christian."
"I am not going to pray anymore."
These are the words that two days ago began....
and haven't since stopped breaking my heart.
Slowly it seems like the pages are slipping from my fingers
as it feels like this book is closing and that the 1 true God
is not longer allowed in.

I must see His Sovereignty.
I must love that attribute.
He is not lost or out of control...I know this.....

I love this little girl and her Muslim faith is breaking my heart.

confessions of 3 in 1.

2009-10-23T12:14:00.000-07:00

I have much to be thankful for-even in the unknown, the trials, and the mysteries of this life-I am thankful. Sometimes it is difficult and I find myself wondering---what is going on here? I am all too quickly reminded that I have a purpose here and now-no matter what happens tomorrow or next month or next year.

We were given the news that we need 20 students or there is a possibility of termination of two positions. I don't know that I heard anything after that. No, it isn't the end of the world but it is causing me to pray diligently to our Lord specifically for more students. I don't think any of us realized that our situation was this dire. All of the other teachers are on a different visa now because the government no longer offers the type of visa that I received (to our school). So the school is now having to manage in a way that depends on students being there (whereas before it wasn't so much of a big deal because all teachers were here on support and the school only had to fund their housing/bills). So-in saying all of this-we need students, as we watch more and more go to their next assignments as this is their transition year. We have had some sweet students come in and God has definitely blessed us in this area. He definitely knows what we need and when we need it. It may be that he desires we work with less teachers and with less "other" things that the school has been able to afford in the past. But it could be that He is drawing us closer as we pray for these things and in December-we will have a full preschool program. This week, we had two children sign up for December! Praise the Lord! Starting either in late December or January-I will have a 3 year old and a 4 year old!!! 4 students! There are rumors of 2 more from the US---and our C.E.E.D (the bilingual preschool program) campaign will go out in 35,000 newspapers on Sunday. We have many leads but we know that God will ultimately send who He wants to BIS. Please continue to pray for this!!

Last weekend, we took some kids on a "survivor" retreat. We weren't sure what to expect, but what we got was far more. My beautiful green team was amazing! They could seriously be missionaries in the amazon! They threw together a shelter from 10 pieces of twill, 3 small garbage bags, and carried in all kinds of bamboo. I was so proud when we all got in and didn't get wet (you had to stay dry to win).

But the kicker came when we really started talking about making a stand and not just going through the motions-doing the hard things. 5 of our kids came up and said that they were ready. Yes. We go to a chrisitan school, but some of our students are not christians and I would venture to say that even more do not come from christian homes. So these "underdogs" as I like to call them-yes, they are from Christian families, but they are working overtime to be good examples-for most of the jr/sr. high population. Pray for them-they are such an amazing group of kids!

Going back to my class-I have two students-neither had no previous knowledge of God, Jesus, or the Bible. I am privileged to plant these seeds. I felt especially convicted during their snack time---like I should be filling that time with something. But what? Well, I am a lover of books-so I picked out a book one day and began to read. The book was A Picture of God 3 in 1 and WOW-did their antenaes purk up at this book. It is quite amazing that I read this book to them every single day and if I don't start by the time they both sit down-they are begging for it-while chomping on their apples that they now bring every single day. An apple has three parts. The peel, the flesh, and the core....but there is only 1 apple. God has three parts. God the Father, God the Son,a nd God the Holy Spirt....but theres is only 1 true God. Just an exerpt from this book...and they know all the parts. They know what parts make them happy-and the dark pages about sin make them sad. We've been reading this book for 2 1/2 weeks and they love it. You can pray for the little boy in my class-he is very sensitive to these things at this point. Please pray for me as I continue to disciple him and talk to him about God. :)

Just a fun picture---one of my best friends here got married two weekends ago :) Raquel and Felipe (he teaches me slang)

My Brasilian sister, Rebeca on the left and my new roommate, Lauren, on the right :) Just a few of God's blessings in my life!

i think about coming home...but i dream about staying...

2009-09-26T21:06:00.000-07:00

that is the truth. i dream about staying here. my heart is full of affections that i cannot explain nor do i want to try-i end up in a blubbery mess...

I sent out(yes, we don't send them back home-we equip them and send them out) my little Saudi Arabian last week-complete with a Bible and 1,000 pictures. I pray that he is transitioning well and using is Arabic and not his Arabi-guese that he used here. I pray that the four friends he talked about will be gracious to him...and I pray that he is reminded of God daily and how He loves him.

It is Spring here!!! It is still raining! Yay! God has been so good in providing a cool rain for us throughout the dry season! It is strange to some-but I rejoice in the odd weather!

Thank you for all your prayers-I am back on track with my Quiet Time-daily! I'm reading through the Bible again and it is even sweeter this time. I'm loving Exodus, Isaiah, Psalm, and Luke! I'm getting up diligently every morning to have this time with God. My days are not easy, but they are amazing because I know that I've prayed over them and that I'm being fed through the Word!

I started Smash Unplugged this week=the group of Jr High Girls that I disciple on a bi-weekly basis(I can see them at school-we just have our formal meetings every other Wed.). I wrestled with what to do with them and finally decided on the attributes of God. I'm using Wayne Grudem's 20 Questions book. We got through God "exists", "is knowable", and "is independent". I just wanted to be faithful to the Word and to God as I shared with the girls. I was nervous, but I loved how Grudem said (in not these exact words)--the more we know about God the more we know how he wants us to be. I think the biggest thing was how God was independent, he doesn't need us, and he is in every person because He has always been around. I'm really learning a lot and pondering many more thoughts as I prepare for these sessions with the girls :)

Lord,
Thank you for being all that you are and for allowing us to know some things and hiding the rest. For being independent and for humbling a servant as she understand more about dependence and less about her "worldly view on independence". Thank you for the opportunities to show others who You are and to watch them grow in their knowledge of You. I pray that they will treasure You and take the Truth to the ends of the earth. Help me to send them out well equipped and ready. I am not worthy, but you choose to use me. Thank you for this opportunity. I praise you-for I am the daughter you have formed, called, and forgotten her sins. Amen.

Confessions of losing....

2009-08-28T18:27:00.000-07:00

I lose things constantly---mostly because I forget them places. I try to solve the problems of right now....and if it takes too much time to solve--I forget-at least for a moment.
I've been really forgetful as of lately...forgetting the time, the date, appointments, graduations, phonecalls-but it hasn't been because I wanted to... In the last few weeks, I've lost a student, already changed schedules once or twice, lost an awesome apartment, gained an apartment with a ton of character (thanks to past tenants-Casey and Daniel), and the list goes on.... But from the losses-I've gained many really cools things/relationships/etc. I'm getting ready to lose another student who is going back to his home country. This will leave me with 2-with one rumored on the way. Somewhere along the way of tirelessly working to start the year, move myself, and get up before the sun---I lost my diligence for my Quiet Time. It is shaming and yet freeing to say this to you-those of you who keep up with me. I'm really struggling to swallow a schedule and keep it down. It was so simple for me to wake up at 4:30-5:00am before-while now, I struggle to be out of bed by 5:45. Please pray that I can be more diligent in rest and in waking up in the morning-because the fatigue is just not going away.
I also ask that you pray specifically for the drug rehab center that I mentioned to all the churches. There are some things going on that could potentially change a lot. Most of these things will happen within the next two weeks. I know God is in control of these changes and these things, but please pray for the people involved and please pray specifically for "Mark" as he confronts rumors and a serious topic surrounding this situation.
Also, continue to pray for our Administration-our curriculum coordinator is pregnant with her third child (she is the prinicipal's wife) with a 5 1/2 year old and a 2 1/2 year old-I think this one was a surprise! Praise the Lord that we have almost a full staff coming-so hopefully this will give her some relief.
Our new staff started arriving late last week and will continue to arrive until the 9th of September. :) I'm getting really excited about them and I thank God for the things that He continues to teach me and really humble me through His creatures, His creations.
Smash was awesome last week-the kids were so in tune with each other-it was completely amazing how they just blobbed themselves together-no matter how they were seperated last year. We were all equally surprised and yet so very proud of their more than adult behavior. They are an amazing! I'm praying for my discipleship group-even though I don't know what that looks like exactly yet......

Heavenly Father, thank you for allowing me to lose-lose it all for the sake of knowing You more. Please help me to lose more of myself so that I can become more like you. Thank you for my Saudi Arabian and I pray that as he travels that he takes Your sweet Words with him and cherishes them in his Muslim community. I pray that as You hang on to him-that He will one day stand strong for you. I also pray for my little Kuwaiti family and their precious mom-who is suffering from homesickness. I pray for all of us who will teach these children in the future and show them Christ's love. Thank you for such amazing opportunities. Lord, please help Mark and this situation....I know You will get the ultimate glory-even as it is hard for me to see this... Please help me to get rest and be diligent in my study of Your Word and with You.

confessions of first class.....

2009-08-05T07:58:00.000-07:00

Well, my time at home was SWWEEETTT! Thanks to everyone who made it amazing-every day was like the funnest Saturday of my life! Three whole weeks of that and now-back to work!

Well, almost back to work. I'm currently sitting in the Rio airport waiting for the second Brasilia flight of the day. This return flight was a little crazy! First-I went to the aiport on Sunday and this sweet man grabbed my bags and realized that they were overweight. I began to explain that I am used to this and explained why....amazingly-the weight was ignored as he checked me in and cleared my bags....Then-I got delayed....for two days! I couldn't believe it! I had BW3's again, BD's, and got to work on my tan (before I go back to winter in Brazil!). Just a little amazing :) In the middle of that-my Mom gets a job (YAY! Answered prayers) and Mare takes me to the aiport for the second time :) Two things happen when we arrive: 1. Again, the weight of my suitcases are ignored(AMEN!) 2. dirty dark clouds start floating in. They make the first boarding announcement to which I say, "I'm not getting on any plane in this weather." I mean really, the last time we had bad weather in Kentucky---wasn't there a tornado? So-we don't board and sure enough-it storms and storms and storms. I make it to ATL in plenty of time-I grab some dinner, buy a phone charger (I left mine at home-amazing that the little place sold my type), and out of boredom sat down to figure out where my seat would be. I began to hear announcements that the flight is delayed because the "entertainment equipment" was not working. As I made my final phone calls and kept one ear open---I realized that my boarding pass said, "Breezeway". I almost started laughing and I knew it had to be a mistake. I checked in and no one said anything. So-there I went. I began to get this special treatment immediately from the stewardess before I walked on the plane. "Let me do this for you," "Oh, that bag is too heavy," "NO! You don't want to put your bag under the plane.' "I will get you a bag and we will make it fit." I was immediately offered three types of drinks in glasses and of course a bottle of water. I chose water and orange juice. The awkward moments began immediately....I spilled the orange juice (haha!) and thought I broke the glass (this is why I am an economy passenger). I was handed this menu with a lot of food that I'd seen before......and I was on the phone-so I just kept talking. I got off the phone and another stewardess said, "Glad you're off the phone, what would you like to eat?" I almost laughed....I passed on the asparagus soup and chose the mahi-mahi (I eat chicken every day?). The stewardess came out, laid a white napkin on my tray, silverware, and salt and pepper shakers (honestly-I was waiting for the vase of flowers..) They bring the salad and a couple other things...so out of the corner of my eye-I start watching all the other people eat these weird concoctions...and well, I start eating them too. It was actually good. I mean-really good! Then, they brought out the Mahi-Mahi with some more concoctions and a lemon. It was really good. I am forever spoiled by what I NOW know goes on in First Class! But that isn't all. She cleared my plate for the second time and asked if I wanted some ice cream. Sure-I always want ice cream to which she begins naming off all these toppings.....I am a little overwhelmed at this point. I eat the ice cream and go to sleep. I sleep until about 5am and then from about 5:30-8. Breakfast was SOOO pretty! It was good to be able to sleep, but I felt completely awkward the whole time. It was so different to have someone be at your service for 9 1/2 hours. Then, I began to think about partiality. How do we treat people? I was clearly reminded of that on this trip and then this morning in Ecc 11. as I read about "In the morning sow your seed, and in the evening withold not your hand, for you do not know which will prosper, or whether both alike will be good. We should be treating all people the same-pouring out the gospel to them no matter what their lives look like...just like my student last year-he seemed impossible.....I prayed for his behavior all year...and in the end...He ended up being amazing....and had an understanding of God. I'm praying that I'll treat everyone the same-that I will pour into everyone without even a hint of partiality.
Talking about school....our school needs more students. Please pray for this provision for us-we are experiencing a year of embassy change. We know that God

already knows what is going to happen! I now have 2 students in my class-one of my students' families just got orders to go back to Saudi Arabia (2 weeks to get their stuff in line and be out of the country) and the other student dropped out because his Mom is concerned that he is too young! I'm praying for whatever God has for me-whether it be 2 or 20. Praying for families transitioning out of Brasilia and praying for the new ones that come in-that we will have a chance to impact their lives through God working in our lives.
Praise-we have a FULL staff with approved visas :) They will start to trickle in over the next three weeks!!! Pray for the Taylors-the adoption has to be finalized before the Brasilian government will recognize and grant them visas for their little boys :)

PS-pictures above are of our new playground and then of Martin and I. He is soo funny...He was looking right up until she snapped the picture :)

confessions of sweetness....

2009-07-20T20:04:00.000-07:00

I didn't realize that coming home could be so sweet. Christmas was so insane-I don't remember half of it and it seemed as if I did no one justice-as far as spending time with them. This time seems a little more slowly and I praise the Lord that I'm actually able to spend quality time with the people that I love so much.

Coming home means: sweet tea, tap water with lemon, fighting with my grown brothers, getting new pants (something i can't do in brazil), enjoying the ministry opportunities developing all around me, Mare, CrossPoint Baptist(ooohh how SWEET this has been and their diligence sooo encouraging!!), books, sweddish fish, peanut butter,

and the loathed question: "So, are you going to stay there?" I don't know. I can see myself fitting in either situation-doing ministry, loving others, continuing my education, seeking God.......there is a sutle tie for both places and I'm searching for the pros and cons of each. But then again, that is not the right attitude to have-but then again, I'm not really sure what attitude to have. The last time I asked God to clearly reveal something......He definitely gave me a clear answer.....months ahead of time. So-here I am. Pray for that.

confessions of the county fair (in Brasil...i think that is Festa Junina) and pancakes...

2009-07-09T10:12:00.000-07:00

The "County Fair" is almost over and I thought I should write before too many things escape me-for I hope to write my next entry from the states. I learned many interesting things over the last few weeks. Ive learned how to control a classroom of 3-6 year olds and Ive watched 2 or 3 of them respond to Jesus. We learned how to pray, when to pray, and why we pray. They informed me that God has the internet and he is real big.
While I taught the fruit of the spirit-peace, patience, kindness, joy, and love, I was also learning these from my students. Particularly one that tested me both weeks. His parents put only that they wanted him to learn Biblical Principles.....and I understand why. His idea of telling someone nicely that he didnt like what they were saying is... ^Shut up^ in his "nice" voice. I really had to be intentional about everything that I did with this child. It just didnt come naturally. Again and again I would call his name, count to three, and wait for his response. He even told me that my face scared him (?-but he would sit in my lap, hang on me, persistantly be the one to hold my hand, etc) but then also told me several times that his dad scares him. And then told me that I wasnt scary and neither was his dad. The whole time I was wondering......is there some kind of psychology to this? or maybe I just needed to pray more? Eventually, he began to open up and I realized that he usually gets what he wants if he talks long enough about it. I didnt give in and that was different for him. Responding to his need for love was difficult because I didnt feel it was right to give in to his every demand. I had to show him in other ways that I loved him-like ignoring his cycle of ramblings about his snack, his dad, and other things. Yeah-it sounds mean-but after about 10-30 minutes of this-he began talking sense again, he did his work, and he communicated with the other kids. I am proud of him, his accomplishments, and the things he will take away from this summer camp. He knows about the Bible (Gods Book-he calls it), he knows how to pray, and why we pray. Truly a labor of love.......and it was worth every minute.

Pancakes may have to wait until I get back to the states. I shared a pancake dinner with two of my Brasilian friends on Tuesday. My dear sister Gabi and then our friend. It is amazing how someone can be so close to the truth and yet so very far at the same time. I see in him a genuine love for people that sees past any outward appearance and looks for the best in them. I am deeply saddened by his belief system and the way he feels about God. Sometimes it feels so unfair. More on this later.

Dear God. Thank you for giving me so many opportunities to show You in my life. I pray that I will recognize them and live them out every minute. I pray for these two sweet people that Ive grown to love so much. I pray that they will one day recognize You and love You. Please help them with any confusion in their minds. Thank you for showing me things through them. Amen.

confessions of the first week...

2009-07-01T11:42:00.000-07:00

A sweet video of the 1st and 2nd grade doing one of our songs :)

Its Wednesday?! Already?! The days are not long enough seemingly to impact all of these students. I have 6 little guys (yes, guys) ranging from ages 3 to 6. Keeping up with them is fun and challenging. 4 of the 6 are from another school, 1 is from a brasilian school, and the other one went to BIS last year. It is different to see the impact that our school has on students. Our students seem to be more humble, compassionate, and treat others more like family. This transition doesnt happen immediately upon entering BIS, but the effects are noticeable after about a year. Our students have their moments of pettiness and being children, but it is quite different. I truly see the impact that God has in our school. He touches their lives and has chosen to impact this community with BIS. Our school isnt perfect-we may not have everything that other schools have, or all the latest equipment, and were still undergoing renovations---when it boils down to it....God is enough. He is using BIS to create these amazing citizens that are academically, spiritually, and socially successful. :) I miss my little guys SOOO very much and I cant wait to see what God holds for me next year. The new program is getting under way but we still arent sure of enrollment. Brasillians tend to wait until the last minute, so my what exactly I will be doing next year....will be in the air until the day school starts. I expect a lot of last minute transitions, extra jobs, and nothing will be as it should. But then, Ill realize that everything is as it should be. I know it will be hard, but God is so good in the hard things and has passed His amazing peace through me in so many of these situations. I just have to be a the vessel. I praise Him for I am fearfully and wonderfully made....made to do whatever He commands next year. :) I love you all. I will see most of you in about 9 days :)

Oh, heres a picture of Tito (Titus) and his amazing creations. He is studying to be a paleontologist!

confessions....of.....winter....or...wait...its summer...

2009-06-27T10:45:00.000-07:00

sooooo...Summer Camp(VBS with an academic emphasis) starts next week!! My classroom is transformed into a sheep pen! The Lovable Lambs-complete with a tree, a sun, and a horse !

I have two students......both ESL.....and well...one of them will soon be ESL.....
he speaks only Portuguese as of yet.... Im guessing this is a little insight to how next year is going to work! Im excited to see what will happen and what God is going to do.
The short term missionaries are amazing-Im loving getting to know each of them! Gods truly blessed us with some great people willing to serve Him in whatever that looks like here!

Guess what?! Ill be home in exactly 14 days :) I cant wait to se all of you!!!

confessions of my first brasilian birthday party!

2009-06-18T10:42:00.000-07:00

Look how precious?! I know my ramblings were just that-ramblings-in the last e-mail. I really love this sweet picture of them...they are not at all organized or posed just right....but they are themselves. And I love it.

You might wonder what I've been doing for the last several days. In between the sad goodbyes of departing staff, cleaning and organizing the mess in my classroom-God's been doings some amazing things......where to start.....

1. well, I'm coming home early-July 11th-I'll arrive! I also got a refund of 900 dollars in the mix of all that-which is pretty spectacular considering that the website says NO REFUNDS. Cheap O Air---for all your traveling needs! So-what was once a not so good, kind of bad situation....actually worked out in SOOO many ways.

2. Nicolàs passed his exams with FLYING COLORS!! It is to my understanding that he impressed the instructor and exceeded their expectations. Amen and Amen.

3. God really mended some relationships in my life over the last few weeks. He showed me how obedience is soooo important. I've been trying to make up for lost time with several new friends....before they permanently depart for the next venture in life.

4. I'm still computerless....and I'm reading books like crazy! Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers.......Im simply speechless about this one...

5. I'm 27! or 17! or 72! WHatever! I was surprised by a group of my closest Brasilian friends along with several of the teachers from BIS. :) Last night was a huge highlight-almost like a dream. I loved seeing them and getting to talk and hang out with them. They worked so hard to make everything come together....and I was totally and completely surprised. There is a place in my heart that grows every day for these people and their amazing love for me.

6. I found out my job for next year. I will be working with one of my best friends (Raquel) in the preschool program. We will offer a program for Brasilian 3\4 year olds. This program will be unique in that no other international or brasilian school has a portuguese/english speaker and a native english speaker for these classes. We will team teach through most subjects while specials will be completely in portuguese for the first little bit. Ill admit. I was "warned" that I would be doing something different next year....and I had a bit of a complaining heart about it. I really thought I would be teaching 4th grade. Which is fine....Im just more comfortable with younger kids and more creative spins on simple concepts :) When they called us in for the meeting-I was a bit smug and anxious about the new assignment...but confused about why they'd called the preschool teacher and portuguese teacher in as well. As Mr. Bose began his spill...I could feel a smile creep......and the excitement flash inside. I wouldnt have dreamed this in my wildest dreams.....and yet, its almost as if my dreams are coming true. I'll have the chance to work with an amazing teacher whom I love dearly, I'll be speaking more portuguese on a daily basis, and getting to work with Brasilians and International students alike. This vision will probably be tweaked and may not work out exactly the way we are thinking---but its gonna be amazing....I can feel it.....

Dear God, Thank you for listening.....and for helping me to understand that You are in control-that I need not worry about next year...next week....or tomorrow. Thank you for showing me how hopeless I am in my own thoughts sometimes and how weak my faith can be....and then showing me how amazing You are. I praise you for the blessings you've chosen to give me and the people that you've allowed me to know and love. Lord-for the people that have been a challenge to love...and a growing situation for me in this year--thank you for them. Thank you for knowing me, loving me, and giving me above the desires of my heart....in spite of what I am. Thank you for another year to serve you and for Brazil.

confessions of...the last day of school..

2009-06-10T16:57:00.000-07:00

It almost does not seem real that this day is over...that this year is over. i could not cry today, but I can cry now. I miss my students and the reality is not yet here. I think in the weeks to come-I'll miss them a great deal. They are no longer mine. I am astounded by the passing of time and that this year is over. I cannot reiterate that enough-even to myself. I feel as if it should be Christmas and that I have so much more to teach them and so much love to give them. There's a special bond that comes about when you have 5 students-it's just very different than having 24. The bonds are so tight with each student and each student with the other. They truly treat each other like brothers and sister(s). They happen to be the most caring, sensitive, loving, and cool kids that I've ever met--all from different continents. One of my parents commented on our graduation picture....No two students even resemble each other in color-their skin is different, eyes are all different, their hair is different, their eyes are different....
I went through their monitoring folders yesterday and their growth made me smile. They've grown academically and most importantly spiritually. They are definitely asking questions about having a sinful heart and when asked about sin-they now answer, "we're sinful from birth" instead of the astounded looks I once received. :) Or-how they beg to review the previous verses.......and then proceed to tell me the meaning of the verse (as we did a small expository on each one when introduced). They are 5! God is so amazing.
Today, I received a handmade pair of earrings (which I LOVE), material from Zambia, my very own "Class of 2021" T-shirt :), and some reallllllly nice "Body Shop" stuff from the states :) But it did not compare to the hugs, smiles, love, and fun we had today. I just enjoyed them today. I wish they could come back to school to just play for the next 35 days---no lesson plans--just playing, crafts, fun, reading "No David" and "David Goes to School". Instead, they will be loving their friends in the States, in England, Zambia, and in Panama. Of course, Thales-will be loving the animals on the farm-his horse, his sheep (he says shep..and his mom tells me that they are actually goats). I think only a few will appreciate these ramblings.....but this is a blog and I'm spilling my heart.

confessions of technology

2009-06-06T07:41:00.000-07:00

who knew that our dependency on technology is so heavy? I only realized this last week how much I really use my computer. Phoning home, email, photos, creating things, lesson plans, graduation programs, invitations, etc, etc.... I realized how much my life revolved around a 14 inch machine.
It's been rather nice in some ways-to not be able to surf whenever I want to or to even be able to type in a Word program for whatever need..... In other ways, it's been a nightmare. I've been forced to leave work at work every day and not leave work until I have everything accomplished (or with the hopes that it is accomplished). So-I apologize for the lack fo communicationi :) We think my hard drive has gone out...so, it might be a while! I'll blog when I can!

mmm..confessions of Siao...

2009-05-22T20:21:00.000-07:00

This was my first "big" field trip. Planning for 54 students, 6 chaperones, a big bus, a little bus, juice, crackers, cookies, popcorn, games, crafts, puzzles, and the list goes on. I really stressed about this one. I delegated responsibilites, had my meetings, and I just worried about it, prayed about it, and worked for several months to figure all of this out. Siao takes care of children who are living away from their parents for various reasons. They just recently went through a change in administration and this was a bit detrimental to several kids who chose to run away. It saddened my heart to hear that Jonas ran away......
We drove for about 45 minutes out of town and then turned onto a red dirt road that reminded me more of a dirt bike track complete with craters and tire busters all a long the way. But the corn and the wheat were so beautiful as they danced on the side of the road. It was picture perfect.
We played with the three students that were there and I got to share a little bit with the new director. He seems really nice and genuine, but we are being cautious. He talked about the projects that they want to cultivate and work on with us. We are trying to build a better relationship with them in order to plan more trips and to get our kids more involved there. I really have a heart for that place, for those kids, and for the workers. I just need to spend more time there. I confess that I was really busy transitioning everyone, setting up snack, giving things out, and taking pictures.......and it just went too fast. We only had one hour once we got there. Next time, I want to get special permission to stay all day! Our kids need more than one hour to socialize and love on these children.
Tonight we said goodbye to some of our favorites-The McNaughtons. I cannot express the sacrifices they've made for our school. The mom came in and tutored, gave resources, did some gardening, painted(when we first got to school), PAO presidentl......just to name a few. I didn't teach her children, but found ways to interact with them through clubs and through a little project with the high school students. They are amazing. Their parents thought it was only right for them to spend their last evening with their friends--so we went to eat at the mall. Of course, we know our kids are always playing some kind of game....and tonight they shared their "metro" game which included the metro car "driver" and some metro "security guards". Oh querida(o dear!). So-they decide that when the doors open (we all stood because there aren't many places for about 20 ppl to sit) that they would run out-touch the wall, and run back before th doors shut. This worked about two times.....on the third one......the doors seemed to shut a little quicker, and I'm sure it was followed by a stern warning. We love the new "closed circuit" video cameras and we don't disappoint the posters that say "Sorria (Smile)". And I will admit-everyone else on the car was smiling after some of the people got left behind. It was good to see their tired faces break into a "Sorria".
Tomorrow-dress shopping!

Please pray for my little ones! I only had 3 students for most of the week. James and Caleb have the "hand, foot, and mouth" virus! We missed them! Also continuous prayer for the Zambian families that will transition back to their home country this summer. Please pray for Nicolas as he undergoes testing in Panama(June 17th) for his new school (after Christmas). Pray for me as I receive my last evaluation on Monday, planning Graduation (June 6th), Senior Prom (May 29th), planning Field Day for PreK and K (June 4th), finishing the yearbook, and of course for a great finish to the year! Also-for a flexible spirit in whatever job they have for me here next year. I pray that I would be able to do all for the glory of God and that these things will not overwhelm me and that I would be strong in the Lord!

By the way-I only have about 24 more days of reading and then I will finish the Bible! I can't wait to turn around and start again. God's shown me some sweet things in the last 10 months-hit me again!

<><

confessions of emails.

2009-05-16T19:24:00.000-07:00

I've come to realize a few things over the last couple of days. Fonts matter. The size of your text matters. Wording things simply matters. People can take your words however they want even when you try to be indifferent. Even when you are trying hard to just say what you want to say very simply. I've been a huge fan of emails up until now and because of the things that I've experienced-I no longer want to use it as a means of communication.

God, please humble me in the areas that I need to be humbled. Please break me in the places that I need to be broken. I admit-I am wayward, I have a temper, and I thank you for the verses that Your Word gives to me to deal with this. Please help me to apply grace where needed-especially as you grow me through the things that are not my fault. Please give me wisdom, understanding, grace, self control, and patience in dealing with these things. Words hurt so please help me turn to Your Words when these things come and try to avert my attention from what is pure, holy, and true.

confessions of......

2009-05-05T17:14:00.001-07:00

Nahum 1:7
The Lord is good, a stronghold in the day of trouble; he knows those who take refuge in him.

A Stronghold. I've held tight to this scripture for several weeks and given it to several people as I see them struggle with certain things in their lives.

As I plan for Kindergarten graduation-the reality of next year keeps waving in my face. As usual and as with missions-nothing is certain.
I've recently received news that my friend, Anna, is suddenly leaving Venezuela (I believe) because of visa issues. In the midst of my unsurety and busy-ness, I praise God that I am here. In fact, I praise Him that He saw fit to call me here. I've had the best year possibly of my life-doing my dream job. But we aren't called to do our dream jobs. The qualifications of my dream job should state, "Serving Christ." Period. Everytime I want to complain-I simply cannot because it is a privilege to be here.
So-you're probably wondering what all of this is about. I was basically told that I should be prepared to teach something different next year. We have no preschool students enrolled and only 1 Kindergarten student for next year. I found out that my favorite Zambian is in limbo about whether or not she will come back for 1st grade next year :( There is a lot of that going on right now. Embassies are telling them what to expect for next year and it is becoming a reality for many of our students that their home countries may be the reality. Or it could be that as a family moves back to the states a father is going to Iraq or that a Zambian mother will return to Brazil without her son and family. This is the harsh reality of an International Community. I am so blessed to have met so many amazing people, but I am grieving them already.

We have exactly 100 days to double the pre-enrollment numbers. He has been teaching me a lot about faith and prayer . Faith in prayer. Several times I thought some things were just too much..... And did He show me!

Whatever God has for me is going to be amazing. He will be glorified.

Thank You for Your unfailing love. For being a Stronghold and for continuing to show me what that means. Please continue to humble me in this way. Thank you for all my beautiful friends and students. Help me to love them and help them transition into whatever is happening in their lives. I pray for wisdom and understanding in this-even with my 5 year olds. I pray for BIS and the need for new students.

confessions of kinza....

2009-04-28T17:12:00.000-07:00

So, I had the opportunity to hang out with one of our students this weekend. My Brasilian sister, Gabi invited us to a production of "Grease" put on by her school (a school to learn English). They did an awesome job and it was cool to see their take on it.

Afterward, we went to lunch and it started to POUR the rain. (I actually froze......and it was probably about 50 degrees....I was dreaming of a warm sweater that day). Anyhow, I began to ask Kinza about her life, where she lived, and somehow got on the topic of marriage. I happen to be fascinated with marriages/weddings in other cultures. So, it opened up a door for her to tell me about "Love Marriages" and "Arranged Marriages". Wow. Somehow I didn't know that that even existed in the Eastern point of view. But it does. She explained that the weddings typically take place for about a week. Both sides of the family sponsor different celebrations or steps to the final ceremony. The families also have to give money to the other family and the bride's parents have to buy all of her appliances, electronics, etc just in case something happened to their marriage or to the husband. It is legal for them to have up to four wives at a time. They can be married as many times as they want-but only four at a time. To which Kinza said that her father only had one.....I think because one was enough! The man can divorce any time that he wants by saying a single word three times (can't remember the word), but the woman can never divorce. She can also never remarry once she is divorced.

An arranged marriage can be between families like with cousins or between family friends. Engagement is usually short--2 to 3 months. You cannot date before (but they do now as new trends are trickling in) and I asked her, "What if you are dating(secretly) and in love but your parents arrange a marriage for you?" and she said, "Well, your parents are going to be really mad!" But, she didn't know anyone who was in that situation. I asked her if she had an arranged marriage and she said, "Nope." Many people ask her about this and her father says to tell them that marriage is not two people getting married, but two families. Many times the families live together for the rest of their lives. The new bride goes to the husband's house (if he is the caregiver of his parents) and they will live them from then on. (I was just imagining some and their in-laws.)....

Kinza is an amazing person. She is Muslim and yet, she participates with us, goes on our retreats, and hears the gospel over and over again. Next year she will graduate at 16 and go to college-possibly in Canada......I'm praying the BIS impacts her and that she will be saved.

On the other note-we had Science Fair...which I was dreading a little bit. I had several great projects but I just wasn't feeling it. We ended up putting eggs in vinegar and watching the acid eat the shells. It was cool, but I was DONE by the end! I really liked hanging out with the parents, watching my students run between my room and the preschool room, and taking pictures of the enjoyment. Basically, we hosted a social event :) Which is fine! Some parents we would never see if we didn't have some required events like this one. So-Success!

Steph and I rented a car this weekend to run around---and I forgot truly what that was like...to be able to go and get something to eat or to just get up and go somewhere even in the pouring rain! Or to go to Pontao and take pictures. To be able to pick up people, build relationships through meeting and giving them rides-it was really great! A sweet weekend!

confessions of ....qualifica(equipping), justifica(justification), corresi(correction), santifica(sanctification), e fortalece(fortifies)

2009-04-14T16:41:00.000-07:00

Well, another Brasilian adventure for the books.

My roommate, Stephanie, and I went to camp this weekend with our Brasilian friends and my sisters :) They so graciously translated and helped us out. I was really impressed with the camp pastor as well as our pastor. Several things happened that reinforced what the camp pastor was preaching which showed that our youth pastor practiced true humility. It was a time of God being glorified in something that was not so great. The weekend turned out completely different than I thought....and God taught me some amazing things.
We learned that the Word of God-equips, justifies, corrects, fortifies, and sanctifies. mm. good stuff.
AND-we also learned that when 1 bus breaks down-all 4 stay together. :) It was a great lesson in sticking together and Brasilians-they wait on EVERYBODY :) and they know how to wait well-playing games, "social", charades, contently, happily, and amazingly. 200 people....waiting....for 4 1/2 hours-no dinner, no water... I really love these lessons because I'm really feeling the "community" aspect of living. No one-is left behind. I love it.

Today, Steph and I started an after school decoupage club and got to build some relationships with some of the girls at our school :) Little do they know......yearbook is about to take over the club......

and....I got up at 4:45 this morning to run. And....I fell. :) I love falling by myself.....because then I don't have to jump up like it didn't happen. :)

More to come.....just thought i would update you.

Thank you God for your Son, Jesus. I pray that every day will be like Easter to me in hopes that I will remember the price and the ultimate defeat over death. Thank you for showing Yourself in every aspect of this camp experience. Even when I didn't think You could get the glory-You knew and You did.
Obrigada Pai.

confessions of crepes and lestani's both sweet and amazing...

2009-03-29T17:12:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I received this e-mail from the Lestani's.....I was a little nervous because my parents generally communicate through the agenda. Nicolas had a minor accident on the playground this week...and I was so scared. BUT-it was an invitation to ice cream and crepes!!! YAY! I wanted to race around! I've grown to really love this family. Nicolas is just amazing and 1/5 of the amazingness that walks into my classroom every single day. Everything really worked out so cool. Mom went with us and she ended up keeping the kids occupied while the Lestani's and I were talking. They shared about their lives and then asked me, "Ms. Bolin, where will you go after Brasil?" PERFECT! Amazing! So-I began to tell them that it was totally up to God and that He had done so many things to get me here this year. Then, it opened up the door for me to give my testimony and tell them how God captured me and changed my life. It was completely amazing. They asked questions, they wanted to know what was so different and so many things. They asked me about what denomination I was which opened up the door for me to tell them which church I go to here in Brasilia...and how phenomenal it is. How great the people are ....etc. :) Just an amazing opportunity. I never dreamed it would go as well as it did. I continue to pray for their family. They informed me that they will continue to go to our school until December when they will move. She said, "Can you teach first grade? Any chance?" :) I don't know what the chances are but I know that Nicolas will get 6 more months of Bible, BIS, and love from all the people here sent specifically by God to work with him. I stand amazed.

Thank you God for your amazing Grace. For your intense love for us-just a human. But you chose us, you love us, and you provide for us. I stand here feeling so inadequate but yet you allow me to be used. Please help me put my flesh aside. Thank you for Jesus and for the cross. Thank you for the Lestani's.

confessions of Thing 1 and Thing 2

2009-03-28T20:09:00.000-07:00

chaos. I was really afraid of that on Friday. Reading Month was ending-Thing 1 and Thing 2 were coming out to cause trouble on our campus. I can only imagine what this looked like to the Brasilians passing along the back lot. About 100 English speakers shouting, throwing water balloons, playing in the soap soccer, swimming in the puddles, and making sand castles on the volleyball court. This is what I was afraid of? Wow-this fear turned out really well. Why is it that some things we should be afraid of and aren't while others we are too afraid of and shouldn't be? What is it that tears us up? Nao sei. (I don't know).

Mom finished her last work day with us watching everyone get soaked and getting plowed by several water balloons. :) The kids loved her and she loved them. I think she REALLY misses my dad. I think this is the longest they've been apart maybe in their lives? Hmmm, and he just can't stand it...I can hear it in his voice the other night. I asked him when he was going to come and visit us. Haha. She's been a super blessing to the school and to me this month. We were asked to "ice cream"tomorrow by Nicolas and his parents :) So-that will be kind of interesting. I don't know that I've ever been out with "parents" before. Just another aspect of the Christian School that is kind of amazing.....

The day was completely perfect and worked out by God. He orchestrated everything to be just right.....in so many little things. The kids weren't so disappointed with all the changes we made from last year.....and I loved sitting in the big rain puddles that God provided. We played in the water, the sand, took off our shoes, and everyone was safe. Thank you, God. :)
It was the best day of school so far. We were to dress up as what we wanted to be when we grew up. Well, I am what I wanted to be....exactly. Funny how that works out..... But I would also like to be a Seminary student-so I threw on my Southern shirt, packed my Systematic Theology and my ESV study bible, jeans, and tennis shoes..... But now, I realize---does Southern have a dress code or have I lost my mind? Anyway....it was a perfect way to dress down a bit.

In my reading-I'm in 1 Chronicles, Joshua, Hosea, and Ezekiel. I'm loving Joshua and I'm just starting the others. :) Mmmm..thanks Mare for the ESV study bible......it really connects a lot of things and helps me to understand how it all goes together-especially with all the kings, their mothers, their territories, sons, etc etc...and the tribes-their land, their daughters, sons, cities,, etc..... Thanks again!

I've also been thinking of betrayal. What should we do about that? I think about Jesus and the way he confronted Judas. But in that, Jesus was paying for all our sins. So=do I have any reason to avenge a betrayer? Big or small? Nope. It has already been avenged. Pray for them, pray that their hearts will be changed. Pray that you can love them more despite their faults so that Christ is glorified in your actions. Easier said than done....but we are commanded to love.

Joshua 1:9Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.

Thank you God for so many things. Thank you for keeping my students safe and providing an amazing day for them. Your amazing hands work calmly in the midst of what we perceive as chaos. Thank you for calming my mind and allowing me to see how vengeance is not mine. Thank you for your Son, your only Son that took the vengeance for those sins and all of mine.

confessions of...I DON'T Want to Get Up Today...

2009-03-20T13:51:00.000-07:00

Wow-today-reminded me of my college days-when I would go to class (after working until 12 and doing homework until 3am and then rolling out of bed at 7:30 for class) in my p-jams. Man-it felt GREAT!!!
But, I will say, the Brasilians don't go out in their p-jams---ANYWHERE--EVER. So-I turned a few heads as i walked out in my p-jams and my housecoat. It was quite humerous to watch people walk all the way across the street as they gawked at my silly appearance. Well, the real test came as I came down the stairs and greeted each one of my precious students in their pajamas :) I loved it. Here are some pictures from the day :) (Okay, so I"ll post them later tonight)
Mom read, "I Don't Want to Get Up Today" before each of the chapel groups and she did a great job!
She also made snakes out of men's ties to go with "The Day Jimmy's Boa Ate the Wash" and it was a BIG hit with the parents!

We've been learning about the disciples this week and how Jesus called them, used them, and was even betrayed by them. My kids really related to Peter and how he was scared and said that Jesus wasn't his friend. One of my unchurched students took my John 3:16 (expository kid book) home and kept it for a week! I'm so excited for their lives. My students are reading their hearts out! The one I worry about the most is finally reading at home (THANK YOU, LORD!). I'm consistently reminded of their sweetness.

Caleb's family isn't sure about their visas. They have until May 8th to get their new visa. :( A piece of my heart is hanging in the balance. Can't he just stay? I'll feed him! I know, I know. Pray for the transition into the new visa and for the family as there are many things to decide. Pray for the visas. Pray for the family. I'm praying.

My CrossPoint family. I love you guys so much and I'm praying for you. Your heart for Richmond is amazing. I've never seen a group of people want to reach out and be just what they've been to the community. Evangelizing, loving, and giving as they do. I pray for wisdom and understanding during this time. Love from Brazil. God is always previous.

confessions of ...Dr. Suess themed days......

2009-03-13T20:43:00.000-07:00

Last week was "Crazy Hat Day"

They had some pretty crazy hats.....but in true brasil fashion--the heat caused them to shed the true hats....and luckily...mom brought them some paper Cat in the Hat hats. :)

This week was "Diffendoofer Day"-we all dressed up as our favorite teacher, administrator, or staff person at BIS. It was quite interesting :)

My little class...unplanned....pulled together our three main administrators

Mr. Bose, Mr. Fryar, and Mr. Lopes

(and yes, Nicolas has a stick on mustache)

My Brasilian sisters :) Rebeca had her College graduation tonight and it was awesome! They really know how to have fun at Graduation. None of this serious craziness we demand in the states. I am so proud of her. She stepped into our school so willing to learn and to take each challenge presented. She overcomes these kinds of things on a daily basis! Congrats!

And now, she can start her professional career ;)

During Reading Month, our Fridays have a special "Drop Everything And Read" time for students and teachers. After calming my kiddos down, I sat down to read a little Tozer. I, of course, found something seemingly profound to me.... God is always previous. :) And so He is.

confessions of a scottish bagpipe player!

2009-03-11T14:57:00.000-07:00

Wow-I don't know who was more impressed....me or the kids. I promise, I thought it would be good for them, but I ended up sitting with the students-mouth gaping open in awe and splendor.

Secret: My dad and I share a passion for the bagpipes! And I really loved this little Scottish man (a Grandad to one of my students) as he played! He is soooo awesome! I really loved him!

Today, he was invited to play for a "Garden Party" because Prince Charles was going to be there! How cool!?

My mom is here and doing a phenomenal job! It is so nice to have the extra hands and feet to keep up with the students and to give even more individual help to the ones that need it! I am so blessed!!!

confessions....of camp....in Portuguese...

2009-03-02T13:06:00.000-08:00

Well, I will say that I being around so much Portuguese ignited my narrow mind. I understood 75% of a sermon last Saturday night! This was SOOO exciting to me. When I would get lost, I would listen very carefully for the whisper of my translator (as she was translating to my new roomie-Steph). So---I praised God incessantly for the remainder of the service. I was amazed at the transformation of my brain and the processing of a new language. I'm by no means fluent-please don't get the wrong idea.... but it is coming together. I still have a hard time with conversations-just because you never know what people are going to say......

The awkward part of camp. Do you remember when you were younger and you went somewhere with your parents. You understood that people were talking around you but didn't really understand what was being said? You just did what everyone else did and then some things that you were told to do? Like a little girl in a crowd. Which was humbling and good for me to look and not be able to speak at some points....

Otherwise........Camp was amazing!!! I met some great people and talked in Portuguese and English-I learned a ton and sat through an amazing class on Spiritual Gifts. I feel myself becoming hungrier and hungier for the Word. Recaps from camp......apparnetly it is real funny to have "date night" at these things. Which "geeks" me out anyway.......but I was told I had to have one. Which was funnier. But then here's the real kicker--as a funny thing---you had to send notes to your dates in which the mc read aloud before and after dinner, lunch, etc. I was mortified. They finally set me up with this dude who also didn't know anyone (and English either HAHA) and it was what it was. I got this really weird feeling in my gut after lunch one day and left early.....as I was walking up the hill---I hear my name over the sound system. ..........yup-I ran the rest of the way to the bunk.

So for that night-I didn't geek out like normal. I was also suffering from a sick eye that was swollen shut (haha-I bet that was funny to look at). Okay- all jokes aside-I learned something.... I learned that I can act like a human being in awkward situations-maybe I'm growing up. I'm always aspiring the kind of grace Julie Lasslo seems to radiate.....and that night-I think I had a little....

I taught them to play the cup game in which we proceded to play until 3 in the morning. It was amazing!

About the eye-I was taken to a special "eye hospital" (literally a huge building for eye specialities) where the lady basically said no makeup, no contacts, no fans, and no more face medicine. So-I gave up two completely..........

My mom comes TOMORROW!!!! For a whole month!!!!! I am so very excited about this but it is almost like it is too good to be true! Thank you to our dear friends that provided her a way to come and see me. She will be working in my classroom through the morning and working in the other classrooms in the afternoon.

My classroom met Flat Stanley and LOVED him. My little British boy said, "Is he really, real?"
:) I've been trying to wait for him to arrive in the mail, but it looks like Carnaval is holding the mail up big time....so I'm going to introduce him tomorrow and read Jenn's blog!

We kicked off Reading Month in which I turned my classroom into a mini-jungle. There are vines, leaves, trees, monkeys, frogs, and book covers hanging from the wires. And-I'm getting ready to turn a corner into the "Where the Wild Things Are".......so that will be very interesting....

I started praying in a circle with my students and doing the hand squeezing thing.....and they really love this. They ask to pray like that all the time!

The funnies:

My kids were reciting old Bible Verses today (completely on their own......) and instead of saying "Exodus" they said "Excellence".......

My British boy never fails me:

"See you later alligator, Don't forget the toilet paper."

confessions of ...International Fair

2009-02-20T20:23:00.000-08:00

These pictures are in order backwards...so you will see preps at the bottom and then scenes from the Fair starting...now....

So this is jellyfish that I made out of ziplock baggies. Portuguese Man-Of-War is one of the animals in New Zealand. The kids loved helping tie yarn, curly ribbon, and swirly contact paper for tentacles. Then, I took a piece of blue netting and suspended the jellyfish from paperclips.

This is a picture of us. We presented three times that night and there was just no time to take pictures while rounding up 8 students, enteraining parents, and get ready for the next presentation.

This is my precious Nana. Her grandfather when to a very nice store and bought her a wood beaded necklace that was so beautiful. I couldn't resist taking and posting this picture of this sweet grandfather giving her this special gift. Her grandparents take pride in her studies especially in her daily Bible studies and with the rest of her academics as well. She is very blessed to have such amazing grandparents that love her and want her to follow God despite her parents.

This is my class, PreK, and my friend Marcos. He came as a guest speaker to talk to them about New Zealand. The absolutely loved him and inspired him. He returned to watch our presentation on Friday night and was very impressed with the knowledge they soaked up in the short time he was there---and that they remembered (and said it during the presentation when he walked in). It was amazing!

Oh-the fun of fingerpainting with students :) We painted long strips of paper with different colors of greens and yellows. Then, we outlined and cut the leaves (great fine motor skill development). These were most of our wall decorations.

confessions of ....a college graduation and 100th day of school week and Jack!!.....

2009-02-06T15:53:00.000-08:00

Confessions of a Graduation!

Me, Ilenie, and Raquel at Ilenie's after party. It was awesome!

Somethings I learned about Graduations:

They get to pick their music.
Their gowns (haha) are A LOT prettier and more classier than our see through paper
Sometimes they have fireworks on stage after throwing their hats in the air
Their round across the stage is like in 4 different parts. They walk to one person and do something, then to another, then they shake hands with the staff on stage, and then they do a final pose before they go back into line. All the while there are photo shoots going on at each little station.
Their friends are there to make the most noise, dress ridiculously, dance, and whatever else they decide to do.
During some ceremonies-this guy with a funny hat looking thing gives each graduate a blessing with this "hat" and then they put their actual cap in place and finish their stations on stage. \
When they throw their hats up in the air-it is like a big party-they dance, sing, say goodbyes, hug, everyone talks, hangs out, finds friends, etc.
It is not customary to get gifts or to receive money here.

**Oh, in other countries, please ask a lot of questions-maybe even the same questions asked in different ways....For instance, when I was invited to this graduation-I ask Ilenie what I should wear. Well, in all of that-she replied, "You know a big gown/dress and a thing on your head. Well, I was under the impression that it would be like the dress I got for the wedding (see previous posts). And somehow in the conversation I got that we were supposed to wear masks to the party. I don't know. Well, we finally got this straightened out a couple of days before the graduation-so it wasn't a tragic mistake. We've laughed and laughed about this mask all week. It is just one of those things! You laugh at yourself, make a few jokes, and go on.

It was a sweet celebration and I mean "sweet".........bon bon kind of like treats-chocolate covered cake with a strawberry in the middle. I could have eaten the whole tray. But I didn't. I didn't even put any in my purse like the other Brasilians (I don't think this is rude---I think it is actually a compliment to do this).

<-----Ms. Rebeca(our amazing secretary) and the Kindergarten class that loves her.

The 100th day of school almost killed me. No really. By lunchtime my body was screaming "3:05" but it just wasn't a reality. But we had a great time-I mean really really good. Each student had 100 things for snack (most little cookies/cereal/candy) and 100 objects to take home. We made hats with 100 stickers on them and wore them around all day. (Note to self-stickers don't stick well to foam). We counted to 100 A LOT of times. Preschool joined us and that was a little insane, but it is really good for both classes. My students have the chance to help them and they have a chance to see what our class might be like/learn social skills from my students.

I went to Nicolandia-which is like one of our travelling carnivals....except it doesn't travel. So-we went and rode most of the rides, walked around, and I had churros and coco water (kind of crazy sour/sweet/salty coconut like water thingy). It was fun to hang out with my new roommate and to interact with the high school students. :) We got lost because I couldn't remember the "brasilian" name for the park...so we ended up at Central Park Bank (haha) and we wanted to go to parque de cidade. You should have seen the pictures of the rollercoasters and the ferris wheel that I was drawing. Extremely humerous. If I could have had you all in my pocket.....

I'm still running. I did 5-20 minute runs, 1-18 minute run, and took a day off yesterday. I'm working on running 2 miles in 20 minutes (I'm up to 1.87) and getting a good pace before I up the minutes. I might be beginning to like....running....don't tell anyone.

**The Comic Section**

Today in chapel, one of my preschool students clapped/smashed a bug with his hands and then showed everyone his prize all squished in his hand (I won't lie-I was highly amused and had to turn to hide my laughter).

Thales- "He, he did it on perfect" (He should have said "purpose")

We got a turtle as a class pet. We talked about touching the turtle and what could happen. (get sick, go to the doctor). Well, we are also doing a month long unit on dental hygiene. One of my specials teachers came to get them one day and we were talking about "Jack". I said to my very smart class, "What happens if you touch the turtle?" My little British boy replied, "You have to go to the DENTIST!" Okay-I was almost in the floor with that one.

confessions of a complainer.

2009-02-01T09:55:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I just want to complain. And then I think-why complain? Does it make me feel any better--No. Does it make anyone feel better--it shouldn't. Welcome to my life-I'm a complainer. This is important. Complaining shows no evidence of a great God who is in control, takes care of me, and loves me. I need to listen to my "Help My Unbelief" album by Red Mountain. It all boils down to my unbelief and the need to hear the gospel day in and day out. To actually preach to myself through scripture on a daily basis. I watched a piper sermon that changed my whole perspective on a few things. He begins by quoting scripture for 10 minutes straight from Psalms, Romans, and a few other places. The way he emphasized the words-it was almost as if he was having a conversation or he was just preaching. It was amazing.
It means that we welcome Jesus into our lives and make room for him to live, not as a silent guest with no opinions or commands, but as an authoritative guest whose opinions matter more to us than anyone else's and whose commands are the law of our life.
He highlighted several points that I know are true: The devil knows scripture and can quote it (reference to Jesus in the wilderness), if you aren't memorizing scripture-how can you live it? You can't. It is simply impossible. John 15:7 says that "If you abide in me and my words abide in you, ask whatever you will and it shall be done for you."
Abiding in Him with this complaining weakness. Casting my cares upon Him is the only solution to this problem. Something I should have done a long time ago.
I've begun to memorize Psalm 1.
Blessed is the man who does not walk in the ways of the wicked, stand in the way of a sinner,
sit in the seat of a scoffer,
-that is as far as I've gotten. I will get the rest and then go on to Scriptures pertaining to prayer.

I got a new roommate this weekend-she sure is a sweetie! We've had a great time going out, exploring, and talking about her new home. I don't claim to know everything about how to live here, but I definitely want to share what I do know.

I'm running again-this time for real. I was playing around the last two times. I ran for 7 days straight-and finished 4 weeks of a 9 week 5K plan. I took a rest day on Friday and then started week 5 on Saturday. Tomorrow will be the test-the plan says that I should run for 20 minutes straight-to which I say, "Really?" That would be fantastic-we'll see tomorrow. I've been amazed at myself thusfar-so it could happen. I feel so fortunate to be able to run. God is so good in that.

My kids are celebrating GroundHog Day and 100th Day of school next week! It is sometimes strange to celebrate holidays that aren't really relevant to Brasil but definitely relevant to an "American Education". Strange Strange. One of my students had the revelation of "God is Jesus and Jesus is God" last week. I love his little heart. Their little light bulbs are on fire right now-working overtime as we write words, talk about New Zealand (for International Fair), and figure out how to write numbers 1-31. They are so cool and don't even know it! :) There are several families considering BIS for next year-please pray for these families and their decisions. Two of them have students entering Kindergarten-which would make my class ALL BOYS! :) If they come, I will have 4 boys and no girls. We're praying the enrollment increases because we do have room for them now!

We're also praying for the new recruits. There are four people already praying about coming! Mr. Bose will go to the states this week to meet potential teachers for next year. We need them! We are losing two elementary teachers and one high school teacher. We are also still waiting for the Taylors to come. They are waiting for their home to sell. They want to be here but are being obedient in continuing to work and to care for foster children in their home. God is not lost in this and those hurting children need Godly influences like the Taylors.

Dear God. Thank you for showing me day in and day out how important You are and how to abide in you. I'm sorry for being a complainer. Help me to complain to you-Help me to run to you and to your perfect word when I need encouragement. Help my unbelief.

confessions of ..pink eye.

2009-01-23T10:38:00.000-08:00

well, i went to bed with a sick eye last night and woke up the same. i've never had pink eye before, but someone here says that i've got it. well, i didn't know this until the end of the day. i really just thought i had something in it. and....really as long as i don't think about it-it's not really that bad. but it looks bad...and it is bad-so bad. my kids will probably all have it next week although i'm pretty good about the hand sanitizer (i never feel totally clean here) so-that's a plus for them. So this could be why I've felt no so good for the last couple of days. I'm a bit weary of going to the doctor here......b/c what if it isn't pink eye---but another type of infection? am I running the risk of losing my sight? God will provide and heal it if it be.

the weather totally cracks me up--today it was absolutely freezing in the morning and then at 2:30 all of a sudden I started sweating? Weird. The Batcave (this is what I call my classroom) is unpredictable when it comes to the temperature-so I'm not quite so shocked at the sudden change sometimes. It is raining for the fourth time today...and I really love it--soothing, comforting,....if only I had a tin roof....I'm actually thankful for the roof as I think about my friends in the park who do not have this. And the wind is ruthless! We would be buckling down for a tornado if this storm was in the US of A. But-never fear-no tornados here!

Random huh? I'm feeling the drain of the first week! But God is so good. I will be up and running before you know it! Let's pray that I have the kind of pink eye that is cured with medicine...bacterial i think....and not the viral. Viral has to run its course and can take days....to heal. Ah! The thoughts of missing church on Sunday are completely devestating and I'm not missing work on Monday-that is for certain. So-pray for my eye (the left one to be specific).

Well, in devotions this week-my boss talked about being Greedy with God. He went a little bit different route but when I heard this-I realized that I can be pretty greedy with God...like He's in my little box and I'm not sharing Him with anyone. Wow. Astounding huh. Are you a bit shocked-well, you shouldn't be. I share Christ daily with my students and others...but also am I greedy sometimes in my life? I remember John Martin telling us we should pray about which fast food restuarant to eat at. But it's true. I should be praying as I walk down the hall, as I walk across the street to the store, getting on the bus, during class, during planning, all the time. Not just when a student is hurt in the bathroom or I'm anxious about how I got three days behind on my curriculum (at Christmas).
Am I greedy in the fact that I don't share my thoughts and pray with Him like I believe He is in control? I freak out over little things and get a little self centered when I'm tired or I have to endure something for 10 more minutes?! I am greedy because I'm independent, strong willed, ambitious at times. My greed in this fashion does not show Christ in my life-just a self centered, impatient, jealous, and challenged person.
Oh, but God is so good as I wake up every morning and read the Word, pray, and fix myself upon Him. Each day is different but He never gives up and I am hungry for His Word. I am convicted in my sin and broken often. I serve a great God. He is so good to me.

Thank you God for pink eye. Please heal me if it be. Thank you for forgiveness-I pray that my students will forgive my best attempts today to teach them. Thank you for my students. Thank you for making Yourself real to them in little things like "God is nonfiction". I love that.

confessions of.... the us of a and other ramblings....

2009-01-13T19:12:00.000-08:00

well, since I didn't blog a bit while I was home-and well, most of you were with me...i'll just say a few words and be done with that part.
I loved being at home with my family, my friends, and all the other weirdos that I know :)
I missed driving my car and getting to that point on i-75 where someone dropped red spray paint on the far right hand lane for like a mile or two.....and then you are almost to the exit (yes, that excites me now). I had some great coffee, amazing chili, and some really cool conversations with everyone. I was very much encouraged and can see how God is using all of that to continuously encourage me in this time.....more about that later. My favorite coffee shop closed and I cheated on them with Starbucks several times.....I guess that is what I get.
I saw the most beautiful baby-Chloe White (newly adopted by the Whites) and got to attend a most special birthday party for her older sister, Gracie.
I spoke at several churches (the highlight!!!) and I absolutely loved sharing about the passion I have for BIS, Brazil, and how God is refining me in these endeavors. I really like to tell others about mission work because I was in their shoes two years ago. I went to a Singles service in Lexington not expecting to be hit with a passion for foreign missions that didn't stop at the tears or the feeling, but turned into a lifestyle. For His renowned-that's why I speak. That's why I tell people what I do-not because I love speaking in front of people (I really don't like to speak in front of crowds) or because I think I do it well. It's the gospel and I am obligated to build other Christians up with this and to encourage them to be missionaries wherever they are and to encourage them to be obedient to God.

I went skiing for the first time :) WAHOOO! That was an amazing time!!! I really wanted to do more than I did, but I kept envisioning teaching in a wheelchair...and I can't do the ABC workout on wheels! Well, I could modify but you know what I mean! Skiing was great-I can't wait to go back. I think I've got my family on board to go next year :) That will be fun! The last few days were crazy. My cellphone was stolen out of the Fayette Mall bathroom on Saturday night (before I left) and my computer-well, it works, but I had to buy a lot of things to make it work.

I need to be honest in the fact that God is really refining me with my electronics and my money right now. The extras in life that don't really matter. I tend to use all my extras with my students, my friends, and ministries around here, but Im feeling called to an even simpler (sp?) lifestyle. I don't know what this looks like as of yet because I just got back into Brazil-but I know that it is probably going to be really hard. God was so good in providing about 2,000 in support as I came back to Brazil. He knew I would need it-as the United Airlines counter refused to let me on my flight until I bought a ticket out of Brazil before my visa expired in July. Their computers don't recognize my type of visa so we went back and forth for about two hours until I finally realized that they were not kidding-they were not going to let me on the flight. I stood there in astonishment and began to work through a process that usually takes about a week. I had no time to find good prices or to try and figure out what date I needed to be back in Brazil for school to start, etc. I slowly began to fall apart. I take things pretty well for a while and then as situations intensify-it all comes to the peak and I end up crying. It was 1:55pm and my flight left at 2:20pm. I was still at the United counter. I just dropped my last dime into a plane ticket and now-the people were busy. I turned to my mom and began to ugly cry (yes, Jenn)-I mean real bad on her shoulder. I couldn't control it and I'm sure the sobs were heard all over the airport. Finally, one of the attendants became free and called me over. They retagged my bags and let me go to security. I finally boarded the plane about 2:15. I don't know why America has to traumatize me every single time I leave the country. I am stronger for it-I dealt with it a little bit better and little bit longer this time (it happens every time). And my dependence on God and just my little under my breath prayers are growing more and more frequent as these things arise.
In all of this-God made it very clear that I will be at home this summer for about 3 weeks July 14th-Aug 8th. I am okay with this. I asked Him several months ago to make it very clear what exactly I was supposed to do. And He did. Mare and Mom aren't sad. :) I'm not sad either-I just didn't like the process. But isn't that the way things are? We are okay in the beginning, don't like the middle, and see God in the end? Maybe not all the time, but sometimes.
So-as Mary becomes a broke seminary student (which I'm so excited for her!)-I have become a very broke missionary. I think it will be good for me. I don't have any back up plans-it is literally all trust. God is so faithful and in a way-I'm kind of relieved at all of these things-I don't have that security in the bank (which would have eventually gone towards another plane ticket this summer or some different mission projects) but He will provide. He cares. He is Enough. It's a good thing that I love ramen, rice, and beans :) And thank the Lord that we have free school lunches-and-I brought back two things of peanut butter. I am so blessed!!! AND-my mom is coming in March for a whole MONTH!!!! Words cannot describe what I feel about this!

Thank you God for all of this. Thank you even if I didn't have these things. Thank you for the things I will go without. Thank You most importantly for your Son, Jesus.

confessions at the marriott of sao paulo...

2008-12-22T22:36:00.000-08:00

well, it's 4:39 am and guess what. i'm awake. i'm not on an airplane. i'm not crossing the equator without a weather radar. and my head feels like i'm still wearing my sunglasses (weird huh)
actually. i'm sitting at a great hotel :) with the air conditioner blowing my hair, and i'm throwing back a coke zero.
i did,however acquire the perfect exit row seat with adequate leg room and a short person behind me (unlike the female high school basketball star that sat behind me on the way to brasilia in july) and a pretty nice man sitting next to me.
the flight seemed perfect. we ate dinner about 12:30am (no kidding) and as we were finishing the captain came on and said that we were having weather radar difficulties and that we absolutely could not cross the equator with no weather thingy. so we turned around (after being in the air for a little over an hour). as that happened-i just began to chuckle at the thoughts of not being home for christmas. that's all i could do. the guy sitting next to me was a bit distraught and I think it made him feel better to hear me laugh about it. so, he struck up a conversation and he laughed at the fact that i was reading the brasilian newspaper, he said, "oh, so you can READ portuguese?" I was like....well, i didn't pay my tutor for nothing.... yada yada-it kept him in a better mood talking about brasilia and the great food they had there, the people of course (my favorite). We talked about my love for the little villages and his inability to live in a place like that. I told him about missions and why I was in Brazil, etc. But this is the kicker....as plane taxied back to the gate-they informed us that we would be going ot the marriott (haha on the portuguese guy said that and i caught it!) to which he looks over and says, (get ready for it) "I know that they will make more than one person stay in a room, you want to room together?" I don't remember my reaction but I'm pretty sure I turned away before I could give him the judgemental eyes. I was so thankful that he stopped to hear an explanation from one of the co-pilots. I ran. Really fast. Got my voucher and took the first taxi I could find. I'm praying for the conversations we will have tomorrow because maybe I didn't do a very good job of relaying information to him about why I was here and WHO sent me. But I clearly talked about missions and that I worked at a Christian school to which he quickly connected that to "peace corp". i'll have to build on that tomorrow.

anyhow-so i'm wide awake and the hotel has informed us that we will not have internet tomorrow (or later today actually..) So-hopefully I won't have to update this again...I will be able to update you in person :) Love you all :)

confessions of "Indescribeable"

2008-12-17T13:03:00.000-08:00

These are my pastors :)

Pastor Obedes

Pastor Ithamar or "Mazinho" haha.

Pastor Marcos Antionio

Well, Louie Giglio hit Brasilia this weekend. Well, not Louie himself, but one of my pastors went to a conference in Hawaii and heard this song. He began to translate and work out some details for about three months. This past Sunday night.....we were all floored. The screen showed us moving through the atmosphere, planets, stars, etc while the full praise team lead the song. It was dark and the visual was amazing in itself. I felt as big as I am so tiny....and realized again how big God is. How much He loves us and yet spins the universe, better than that-created it.

I realized that 99% of these people would be hearing this song for the first time and I began to look around. Wow. They were amazed and awestruck. Then, just when it couldn't get any better-on one of the last rounds of "You are amazing God"-a trumpet and saxophone resounded from the balcony behind us. I've heard this song a hundred times and this time was so sweet. mmm maybe it is because I love these people, their language, and I'm so thankful for the the amazing things God is showing me through them and my time here with them.

I also had a chance to go an end of the barbecue or translated "churrasco". Of course the food was amazing, the fellowship was awesome, I got to eat mangos off the ground, and I got to sit on top of this amazing little building and watch the rains roll in.

updated confessions...

2008-12-16T07:55:00.000-08:00

This week is crawling by and it is driving me crazy.
As much as I want to forget last week-the reminders are coming every single day.
The parents informed me that they are considering the other American school (non-Christian) for their children. They also asked me to write a letter of recommendation to which I took to my boss and he is taking care of that situation. I really love this family-lost and yet so loving. It is amazing how one event-can change everything.
Also-because of this incident, we've been reported to the Department of Education here in Brazil. We aren't sure how they found out but it could have been through the hospital (kind of like social services) where the student was taken. It keeps getting bigger and bigger. I know God is in control-I'm just praying for our administration. They've taken a lot of blows for the school this semester. I tell you about being reported because there is a chance that they could delay our opening after we return from Christmas break.

Something good: I had an awesome time building some Brasilian relationships this weekend! My church family is becoming more and more like family as well as some of the young people at another church. One of my pastors says, "You are not a visitor, you are family. We will be waiting for you." I also signed up for the Sunday School class on Calvinism-which I'm really excited about. One of my friends will translate and it will be cool to have someone to discuss this topic with.

So-I have much to look forward to and yet I will probably be missing 1/5 of my class when I return. I rest in the haven of prayer as I am heavily troubled and tired by the events. I am encouraged by the quiet times I'm having and in knowing that I'll be removed from this situation for a short time. Delivered into the arms of love in 6 1/2 more days.

confessions of a miracle....

2008-12-10T11:02:00.000-08:00

Today, I have a lot to be thankful for. Maybe more than I ever have.
I was reminded today just exactly how much I love my students. How much I cherish
each little growing personality, character, and spiritual life.
One of my sweet children was injured in an accident in the bathroom due
to a malfunction of the bathroom stall. You may be thinking-oh that is not bad....
well, we have solid marble bathroom stalls here. So, as one student closed the door,
the whole front panel came crashing down on another student. I was within view of the bathroom and the visual that I have will be forever etched in my mind. Unfortunately-I
can't shake this like an etchasketch.
It took three adults to remove the door from the student and to take him out.
I'll never forget his little face. I felt sure that he had internal injuries, broken bones, a concussion-all of that. I assured the other students that it would be okay-lined them up against the wall, and ran off to the office (there was another teacher present). I realized immediately the impact this would have on the school and on the student. This isn't something that is our fault, but it just adds to the overwhelming trials that keep showing themselves as we end this semester. I should thank God for the trials but it is extremely difficult when you have a
traumatizing visual to precede and follow those thoughts.
The school nurse checked him out, applied band-aids and ice to his very minor injuries, and said that everything on the outside was fine. I am a bit relieved but am reminded that I have to write up an incident report and call his mother. We felt like it would be a good idea for him to get an x-ray as well. All of that was okay, but I began to dread the incident report. I knew that I could not describe in enough detail what I had seen. I also knew that they would ask us to show them what happened. And they did. The reactions were predictable.
I experienced a miracle, grace of God-all of that today. I could feel Him working all around me, listening to my silent prayers, and so many things. The doctor called to say that he is fine. He has no broken bones, and no internal injuries. We are all looking at each other as to say, "How is that possible? Thank you, God!" I am shown God's amazing strength and the things He can do. I know He is getting the Glory from all the staff (especially the ones who lived this thing out) and now-we are just praying for the parents. We know they are from a Catholic background-but we do not really know where their hearts are spiritually.
There are many complications that could go with this incident-please pray for our school, for our staff, and for me as we all deal with this and the other problems mentioned below.
I love you guys.
I will see you in 12 1/2 days.

confessions of.....

2008-12-03T14:19:00.000-08:00

Many of you know that our little school turned into a big school at the beginning of this year. We've overcome many things while enduring construction noises, construction workers. . . . , new surroundings, flooding, etc. These things taught us to be patient, to lean and love on one another more, and to have faith that God's plan is unfolding before our eyes.

We recently concluded Phase I Renovations to our new campus. This did not come without some added difficulties and just Satan really trying to tear us up. Try as he may-God gave us steadfast hearts and some amazing encouragements during this hardship. He gave us all peace to do our jobs and be amazing for our students. His grace in our attitudes kept everything rolling and most of them without a clue what was happening.

Once through that storm, seemingly, it was over. On Tuesday, our administration was informed that definitely there is a single and a family here illegally. Their visas expired and the government will not renew their original volunteer visas. My roommate shared that she has until the 19th (our last day of school) and then whether or not she will come back will be contigent on her receiving a tourist visa as she returns home for the Christmas holiday.
She shared that she is just not ready to do that-to say her good-byes in two weeks. She also has a boyfriend here and he is one of our co-workers. They are really close (like Tyler and Marie for those of you who know them...).
The other family includes a wife and three children. The three children all go to BIS and Bob teaches several high school courses. His wife shared this with me yesterday:
"it is funny that we agonize over what he wants us to do as we"wait for an answer" not realizing that the "nothing" we experience is part of his answer. "

The air around school was pretty somber this morning as the rest of the staff found out in a meeting. Amazingly enough, we walked out of the room encouraged and knowing that God is definitely in control. We understand that He is not lost in this-as scary and unbelievable as it may seem. I am so thankful for that. It is hard not to fast forward in my mind as to what it is going to be like without them. We are praying for mercy and just wisdom for us all-as we wait for our principal to get back into Brazil and as we inform the parents. This would cause 2nd grade to become 1st/2nd split as well as an administrator coming in to teach Bob's History, Computer, and Geography courses. Please pray for our staff as God unfolds this plan. Pray that we are bold to step up when help is needed and that we are diligently praying for the people involved in this sudden change. Please pray that they will have a peaceful Christmas and that God would draw them closer and closer to Himself as the events unfold.

It's been a weird week for us all.....
I've been battling allergies and sinus problems, my kids have been animals (: , and one of them passed out (literally) on top of me today. I flashed back to (my brother) Andy's seizure a couple Christmas' ago. I don't think I can talk about it right now.... thank the Lord-he is fine. I was so tired by the end of the day that when the kids suggested a second nap at 1:45-I agreed and let them lay down again. I love them so much-I mean-I really love them. I wake up every morning looking forward to teaching, loving, and giving them my best every single day. Even today-when it felt like I had a concrete block in my head-I knew I couldn't miss. What if the sub didn't know our "evens" cheer? or our "Daily ABC/123 Workout? I HATED the fact that someone else would be teaching my kids. So-to answer that question for you Jenn....that's what you do when you need a sub-you think about it...and then you just go. :) The funny thing is that it would be someone pretty close to the kids-an administrator, the preschool teacher, or someone who is consistently at school. And I still worry about them :) They are so independent now-they change the Classroom helpers themselves every day, along with line order, and getting the attendance sheet. This probably means nothing to you-but it is completely amazing to see them ask for and take responsibility. :)
we have a website :) www.msbolinsbees.com pictures for those who really love to see them :)

Love from Brazil for 18 1/2 more days.

confessions of thanksgiving....

2008-11-26T17:05:00.000-08:00

I have a ton to be thankful for.....

Let's see - the stillness of this moment...and then the wind SLAMMING the door...I almost fell out of the hammock.

Or, let's talk about the total "TommyBoy" moment I had last week. I stopped at the store to get a few things before work one morning which caused me to catch the late bus. No problems with the bus-just a little later than I ever want to be there and I'm by myself. So-I cross one stream of traffic and make it to the median (which is like a parking lot) and proceed to head across the other stream of traffic..... but somehow as I proceeded-I was stopped by sudden tripping over the cracked sidewalk. Normally this wouldn't be funny but today-oh yes. By this time the morning traffic was flowing pretty heavily and there were tons of buses all around-not to mention the light turning green for the oncoming traffic to come straight toward me as I fell into the far lane of traffic. 10 seconds later and I would have been hit or I would have hit a car (that would have been amusing...can you imagine the driver?). Not only do I fall but my backpack goes FLYING over my head and for a split second I think---yes, this is funny to a couple hundred people and I think I actually chuckled at the scenes in my head. Falling is funny sometimes. I was up in about 6 seconds and out of the way. I'm sure you could imagine my prayers of thankfulness for the last two blocks of my trek.

Hmm, I'm thankful for the beautiful relationships here. I have several Brasilian friends that make my job completely amazing :) Rebeca is the secretary and her mom calls me her "American daughter" in which I love. They are such a precious family to me. Rebeca's sister, Gabi, is also amazing. She could be one of the best translators I've ever had. Truly a servant using God's gifts. She never fails to go with me on Saturday nights and I'll be eternally thankful to her for this.

And then there's Raquel. Hmm, servanthood. Her attitude is positive, encouraging, and loving. She has a way with the students in which is a mystery to me. She's like a mother hen-they all just follow her-no matter what age. We are different and yet-we work so well together. We've shared a classroom two times this year and basically team taught. I'll forever look up to her. God uses her to teach me something new.....almost every day!

She also invited me to go to church at IPN-a place where I've fallen in love with God's people and their diligence to the Word of God. I'm truly amazed! I believe that I'm going to the best church in Brasilia!

Story of the week:

So one of my students has a problem with some of his underwear.....I mean-a real problem. I don't know if they are just a bit uncomfortable or ....what, but on one occasion I recovered them from the garbage can. This was a huge deal as I ended up calling his mom to confirm that the lizard camoflauge undies were his...ahh. Well, I thought he was over doing that until yesterday---I hear this loud giggling and someone yell, "Ahh, UNDERWEAR in the sink!" "Who left their underwear in the bathroom?" I went to calm them down and I knew immediately whose they were. I looked over and he shook his head no. The other little boys kept on and on about this matter......and finally he said,"WHOSE GOING THROUGH THE TRASH!!"

I love it when they tell on themselves. Better yet, I love writing in the agenda, "I don't think he is very fond of the underwear he was wearing yesterday-we found them in the bathroom." Ah. Kindergarten. I don't know that I'll ever have a class quite like them.

More to come.....

I'm also thankful for my Mom whose love endured many hard years of raising me and even some years of distant hellos. I love that she is serving God in Cuba this Thanksgiving. :)

Three of our five family members will be overseas all at the same time in just a few days. Sharing God. Thank you to the people who help make that possible-for obeying the convictions of your heart and for giving. It is a truly a privilege and I recognize it as just that. "He doesn't need me but He chooses to use me." I'm thankful. Thank you, God.

2008-11-16T15:53:00.001-08:00

Hey everyone! Whew! Just got in from an action packed weekend! Probably one of the most back to back "new" experience weekends I'll have here in Brasil (I can spell it that way, right, I live here....)

First, I went to Hillsong-a free (with a donation of a kilo of food) concert. It was really cool to see so many people singing the same Hillsong favorites "Mighty to Save" "Worthy is the Lamb" there were others such as "Shout to the Lord".... We got there at 6 and waited until 10pm for Hillsong to come on. It is always in true Brasilian fashion to be late-fashionably and unfashionably :) I relearn that every single day.

Next, I attended my first Brasilian wedding! The BIS Secretary from last year got married on Saturday. She had an evening wedding that I wore a prom-like dress (no kidding). My informant told me that weddings are a BIG DEAL! And she was right-most people were dressed-not in their Sunday best-but their formal finest! Some were dressed semi-formal--but it was really nice! The power went off in the middle of the ceremony-so that was interesting. Cake, Guarana, water, and Coke were served to us (we stood at the reception) along with chocolate "bon bons".

Some Brasilian wedding stats:

it is common for the Bride and Groom to sing to each other during the ceremony.....Tayana and her husband did--as she was walking down the isle. Quite amazing she could hold that together-that would never fly in the us!
the bride is ALWAYS at least 30 minutes late....more common that she is later than that.....we waited for 1 hour!
the bridesmaids and groomsmen come down the isle but then sit on the front pew. Typically the parents sit up on stage.
Usually there is a "fake" cake that is made or "rented"-it is absolutely beautiful but not eaten.....(different, huh!)
The bride 9 times out of 10 rents her dress. She can pay a lot of money to have the "first wear" of a dress that she gets designed for her wedding-but it will still be rented. They can pay up to 2,000 reals for a "rented" wedding dress. insane-right? but then-they don't have it rotting in their closets.
sometimes the weddings start at like 7:30-8:00; the reception starts about 10pm, and they dance and celebrate until wee hours of the morning. These weddings are usually very expensive and the hosts will buy guests a pair of haviana flip flops (around 14-20 reals) to dance in.

Amazing!

Last, I attended a camp with the Youth (ages 18-35) from the Igreja Presbyterian Nacional (the church I regularly attend) and it was amazing! I'm building relationships, loving these people, and watching their cultural norms unfold before my eyes. I'm doing a lot of observing and trying to figure out what to say when EVERYONE asks, "So, how is your Portuguese?" This is really a blessing---but it is still very hard for me to think of things to say to them. I get really embarrassed because I don't know all the rules and if I just say anything-it ends up being SOO wrong or really funny. As much as I like to laugh and joke (and be joked with)-I really hate getting laughed at because of my Portuguese. It does not come very natural to me yet and therefore makes it difficult to think of things to say when put on the spot. So-I am challenged to study and make a better effort. People are no longer allowing me to speak English (which is truly a blessing-I promise) and I praise God for this push to try harder.

I'm running again...and I hate it. Running clothes get on my nerves....once I ignore the fact that they are going to ride up or fall down---it is sweet and I end up organizing thoughts, relaxing, and pondering the hard things of the day. So-it's therapeutic and that is the only thing that keeps me going back.....because I truly detest it.

In my Bible reading-I should be through the whole Bible by May 25th. This is if I read 5 chapters a day (I read one chapter from 5 books every day). Lately, I've been in Leviticus, Psalm, Isaiah, John, and 2 Thessalonians(sp.) It is so sweet how sometimes 3 and 4 of these books will line up and talk about the same things-even with my random way of going through the Bible. Just another awesome wonder of God :)

I miss you guys! I will be home in about 35 DAYS! I can't believe it! I've already filled my Itunes classroom playlist with my favorite Christmas HYMNS and of course David Crowder's Feliz Navidad. I've decided that it is okay to start this early because they don't celebrate Thanksgiving (only our BIS staff)--so we're gonna do Christmas for like a month!! It's kind of hard though since I'm used to sipping on hot chocoloate, bundling up in a blanket, fighting with my grandparents over the thermostat, and of course Thanksgiving all building up to Christmas. I think many of my plans for the next month include my bathing suit.....so....it won't feel like Christmas until I hug my parents and my nose begins to run in the 30 degree weather :)

Prayer Requests

Taylors and Stephanie Downing-Visas and prep to come (hopefully early Jan.)
Our staff has been asked to make resignations as soon as possible in order to begin recruiting early (because of the visa process)-so there is a little stress going around about that.
My sending church, CrossPoint Baptist-they purchased land a few months ago and still greet many guests on a weekly basis. Last Sunday they had 50 guests! How Cool! Pray for their Outreach ministry and what to do with all the new faces!! They also have an awesome College Ministry that keeps growing and growing!!!
For my students and their families during the Christmas season. We will put on a Christmas program that is required for all students and most families will attend :) This is a great way to share and show the Gospel!
For our school. We JUST finished Phase I of renovations. We are encountering some opposition in different areas and it is vital that we stay on our knees, humbled, and seeking God in all areas of our lives and in this school.
For our principal, Scott Bose
For the ministry opportunities that I've encountered and will be involved very soon!!

confessions of Gadsby's Hymnal

2008-11-02T08:08:00.000-08:00

As I was looking for some new music this weekend-I stumbled across Red Mountain Church (of Birmingham, AL) and their "Gadsby Project" to which I quickly became a bit enamored. I quickly decided that I wanted the "Help My Unbelief" album. I've found many encouragements in this beautiful collection. I have even added Gadsby's Hymnal to my Christmas Wishlist.

I think all of us struggle with some form of a past sin whether it be hidden, confessed, or repented (or maybe all three)-and I had a conversation this week that basically said, "My unbelief is my stronghold". About 30 minutes later, I realized that this is so true. Our unbelief is the stronghold. It's not that God doesn't have the power to heal us-it is simply our unbelief-our flesh, this earth, and maybe our deep condemnation.

William Gadsby was a Baptist minister from a poor background and as a child he went to a hanging. It is said that this ghastly sight forever "preyed upon his mind" in terms of eternity. I think of this and how the spectacles of our lives prey upon our minds. These things should drive us to share the gospel-through our words and lives with others. We should be haunted by the eternity of others-to be forever sharing our eternal perspective with others. I can confess that I'm not impacted by that enough.

He ministered for 38 years at St. George's Road Baptist Chapel and traveled 60,000 mostly by foot to preach the Gospel. In 1938, he and his son, John, started a magazine called "Gospel Magazine" which is still in print.

Ol' Gadsby must have been a force to be reckoned with at his time. I think he would have been a modern day Mark Driscoll-very practical, truthful, shocking, convicting, and seen as crazy. I can see that-he was not a fan of musical instruments in church. He was not afraid to argue for the sake of the truth. He was also weary of missionaries because he felt like many of them preached erroneously and spread false doctorines.. Hmm. Yikes! A part of me wants to rebuke him and in another way-I know my missionary friends and I have experienced some very confused people-confused by the doctorine taught by missionaries.

This is what was said of Mr. Gadsby by Richard Lord,

"It is now nearly forty years since the devil and I were friends, and now during that time we've had many a conflict; but if the devil has begun to send such men as Mr. Gadsby to preach the gospel as he does laying the sinner in the dust and exalting the dear Redeemer, then the devil and I will be friends for ever."

One man so disliked Mr. Gadsby that he went to towns and preached against him. This man was soon dismissed from his congregation-to which Mr. Gatsby sought him out. From then on, these men were friends to death.
As I continued to read a biography of his-I became more enthralled.....and suddenly I was on the 110th page and out of time. ....so I leave you with these few thoughts in hopes you will check out some of his hymns....ahh....beautiful.
To read his biography online:
http://books.google.com/books?id=rTZsc7rMBzkC&pg=RA1-PA74&lpg=RA1-PA74&dq=William+Gadsby+and+Andrew+Fuller&source=bl&ots=pffuWtItip&sig=ZXyiH--fqMxovh0T9lXu7FTJcv4&hl=en&sa=X&oi=book_result&resnum=3&ct=result#PRA1-PA113,M1
I could not put it down (or close it if you could say that about my laptop..) :)

more pics...

2008-10-29T15:07:00.001-07:00

confessions of the smell of rain...

2008-10-29T14:15:00.001-07:00

at this point, there isn't anything (in nature) much sweeter than the aroma of the rain passing through Brasilia. We experienced the hottest day in the history of Brasilia yesterday. We all definitely knew it and felt it into today as well. In the states-it's no thing-because of course we have all kinds of air conditioning-cars, houses, churches, schools, restaurants, etc, etc. You don't have to go far to get some cool, crisp air. Well, it just doesn't work that way here. You get used to the sweating...but it seemed like the kids just lost their minds...! Ha! Anyway, so I had to take care of another box today-so I invited my Portuguese teacher out on a little adventure. We made it to the post office after hooving it up the hill. Once our business was finished-I remembered that a brand new Subway opened up in our Quadra. We walked there and to our amazement (as we were both melting) it had air conditioning! Word! Then, as we were cooling off and drinking our drinks-we could see the strong breeze running it's fingers through the palm trees-which brought the rain soonafter.

So, needless to say, I'm enjoying the breezy night. Thank the Lord for His provision in rain.

I helped with SMASH In-TENTS this weekend. A serious time of in"tense" worship, testimony, and an awesome Word from the Lord. We had non-Christians and Christians alike attend this all night (and into the next afternoon) service/time of fellowship. We camped (I hung in the hammock), roasted strawberry marshmallows (not recommended), sang, got to know each other, and did some crazy games led by the Smash Leaders. Through all of this, two girls came to us to let us know that they had accepted Christ. We are seeing true conversions in so many of the students' lives. Their brothers and sisters are attesting to their desire for God and His Word. A-Mazing.

Ramon G. getting pelted with cheerios

Ana-taking in the fire, songs, and beauty of the night.

Lucia (to your left) and PJ (white tank, red skirt (in right pic) are our newest sisters in Christ!! We are so excited!

In Kindergarten, I led Chapel last week and we are teaching the Armor

of God-piece by piece. For my turn,

I did the "Breastplate of Righteousness" to which I covered a box in tin foil and wore it around. My kids thought that was the best thing...and wanted to wear it as well. :)

confessions of being a daddy's girl

2008-10-20T15:37:00.000-07:00

I love Brasilia-seriously-love it. Even when my chicken nuggets have cheese in them (gross) and ketchup can't even make them taste good or when your body won't let you sleep longer than 2-3 hours.... Despite these silly things.... I love it here.

But as I watch the palm trees sway-I began to miss my earthly father. I miss the feel of his wool suit on my face as he hugs me tight. Or-talking with him about Jesus, Piper, and silly memories. I love sharing MyTime coffee with him and making runs just to get him a bag of those great roasted beans :) Or maybe even cleaning up the coffee mess from our (leaky) cheap coffee pot at home after we've had our morning cup... I love being a part of his life and God allowing me to have a hand in his dreams-such as the John Rice Center and Manchester in general. He is known because he does what God tells him to do. He knows the cost of discipleship. Some hate him, talk about him, and still yet he loves them because most of them are lost. Because He is doing the work God called him to do.

And that helps me get through the day. Pray without ceasing. Hide His words in my heart. To do the hard things. Fight the flesh. To do the work God has called me to do. And to think about my Dad-diligently working, tirelessly, lovingly, and Christlike.

confessions about Children's Day and a few updates

2008-10-10T19:00:00.000-07:00

These two are a couple of my little men. The dynamic duo is the most correct term for these guys. They make my days most interesting....

So-Children's Day was really nice. I mean-it was stressful about an hour before because I had no clue what I was/was not doing. :) My kids were tearin' up the room (i mean-they cleaned it and it still looks like a tornado hit it in my opinion) and there was no calming them down. We dismissed school an hour early so we could start
the fun and games.

This little guy-I could possibly have next year. He is 4 and speaks Arabic...

I will admit-it was so worth seeing those beautiful smiles and listening to the glee in their voices as they played games. This concept is for the children and it benefits them as well. Each grade level decides on a game, puts it together, and collects the tickets during Children's Day. The class turns the tickets in for money. We get to pick whatever we want for our classroom! I really want some bean bag chairs for our Reading Center. I have a list of wants like-a grocery store set (so they can play with money) and some new books for our classroom library.

We'll see :)

This is Kaylee Bose-our principals' daughter. I was supposed to have her last year....this was after her "touch up".

This was a fairly smooth week even through all the changes in schedule, switches in classrooms (we moved out last Wednesday and moved completely back in yesterday) etc. My students were excellent and I am amazed at how adaptive they truly are. Once they see me adapting-they just fall into place. I wish you all could see what I see and watch from a distance as they progress. I know what it means to be a teacher-to be blessed beyond measure-to be interacting with these children. Sometimes it is hard, it is not fun, and it wears me out. But then-it starts to come and the victory is 10X's better in the end. (Like explaining-"Draw a group that shows 1 more than the group on top--"for real" is what I have to say). The gains make it all worth while. I ponder a student's conceptualization of something one day--the next they are spouting it out to me. Praise be!

This is Kinza. She has the "Flamengo" soccer club flag on the left cheek and their rivals on the left. I think she mentioned that she almost stopped traffic a couple of times on her way home...

You can pray for the salvation of all students pictured above.....

Funny Quotes from the week:

Keep in mind-we're studying Families

"Yes, if you don't get married, you'll stay little forever."-Nicolas (matter of factly)

"Well, I'm never getting married." -Nana (pronounced Nahnah (not nana) and the only girl in the class)

"But Nana, don't you want to get married?" -Nicolas

"Yes, Nana, you will stay little forever." -Thales

{At this point they are all into the conversation giving their 2 cents}

I quickly intercede at this point because I"m about to bust out laughing-I explain that I'm 26, fully grown, and I'm not married. Nicolas didn't know what to say.

Oh-the best one is today-I'm eating lunch with Nicolas and Caleb. As we eat, I'm trying to have a normal (non-teacher) conversation with him.

"Nicolas, what does your dad do for work?"-me

"Well, he eats, reads to me, and takes out the garbage." -Nicolas

"Okay, what does he do for his job?" -me

"Oh yes, he makes the pencil work and sits at his desk." -Nicolas

The view from the sweetest/hilarious 4 year old. I love the "makes the pencil work"

Reading:

Almost through Hebrews and I think I might linger there for another 13 days. It is that good to me right now. It is amazing how things line up between the books in the Old and New. I am constantly reading things that coincide!

Praise the Lord:

I got my boxes!!!! I dumped everything in the floor and then scrambled for a place to store it all. The kids LOVE seeing all the new "things" and playing in the new "centers." :) We now have two Leap Pad alphabet games (thanks Mom), new Math manipulatives, books, (rainy day) toys, and so much more. My mother is amazing.

confessions in randomness....

2008-10-04T18:21:00.000-07:00

Hmm.....I keep thinking that bugs are biting me, but it happens to be the softest breeze tickling arm hairs individually as I sit on the "porch" at the mk's house. I can't help but throw open the sliding doors every morning and every evening. It's one of the most exciting parts about being here this weekend!

And let me just tell you-Brazil has cicadas. They don't hum.......it's more of a siron sound-really weird-only in the daytime and really bad after 12pm.

Currently I'm reading through Exodus, Psalm, Isaiah, Luke, and Hebrews. I've read through Genesis, S of S, Proverbs, Esther, Ecclesiastes, Job, Matthew, Mark, Nehemiah, and maybe a couple more-I don't have my checklist handy. There's not really any order to how I'm reading them-just that I am and I think I really like this method as odd as it might seem to others....

I'm really lovin' Hebrews right now....I mean really, really. I was inspired by this book last fall as I attended some of Ashland Avenue's College Outreach Services, then Piper preached about "going outside the camp" at T4G(for some reason I took notes in my Bible margins-so I see it frequently), and this week, a "homeland" verse caught my attention to which I quickly shuffled it into the mix of my daily chapter reading.

Last week we went to the....

Zoo :) No one loves the zoo more than my students...I'm convinced.

This week, we're going to learn about Jesus Calming the Storm, letters I and D, counting and graphing, and Families. I'm really excited about the Family Unit in Social Studies. We have such a diverse population and some cool "make ups" of families even in my class of 5. I'm most excited about one student that is adopted. :) I have a little story for this bit of information: Every Tuesday is "Bring A Book Day". This is even more popular than show and tell in my class! I get some books in French (they love that I "read" the pictures), some in Spanish, English-whatever. Last week Caleb brought in a book called I Love You Like Crazy Cakes by Rose Lewis. I didn't know what it was about, but I was bawling by the end. I mean-full out tears and almost sobbing through the words. Through each page-Caleb said, "That's me." "That's the airplane my mommy and daddy came on." Oh-and I cried even harder. They laughed and begged me to read the book again. I said absolutely not. I knew I could not make it through again. My heart is inclined to orphans and to adoption. The White's in London, KY are huge inspirations as well as the Caldwell's (whom I've been following since their first adoption announcement). As I read that book, I cried because I know so many orphans are receiving homes. My best friend, Mary, and I have been supporting a foundation called "Holt International" for almost 2 years. So far, we've supported three children during their "middle ground" (the time between orphanage and the actual picking up for adoption). We rejoice in each letter that we receive saying that "Joshua's" been adopted and now we would like to introduce you to " ". We love it. Maybe my heart is inclined so that one day I will financially support an adoption as a wife and a mother. Who knows?! Maybe I will always love and support orphans from afar. James 1:27 will keep me going either way, "Religion that is pure and undefiled before God is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction and to keep oneself unstained from the world."
And-the conviction sets in.....because as I love the first component-what am I doing about the other two........

confessions of showers of blessings...and the wise little owl...

2008-10-01T16:00:00.000-07:00

The first picture is of the rain. Our first really hard rain. It was really nice at first...I began to take some pictures and video of my window that has been leaking---when I realized that the ceiling was leaking as well....I moved my desk and glanced out the window to admire the rain and to thank God for the coolness the rain brings. As I looked out-there was a little owl braving the wind, and rain on the wall (there are many ledges and places he could have gone to take cover-anywhere around the school). He was looking directly at me as if he was trying to say something. I was a bit mesmorized by him and forgot about the mess. As our campus maintenance man was waiting for me to figure out where everything should go-I showed him the little owl and he went to get another teacher to show her. We were all just admiring him when I turned around and the water started flooding in from our little playground into the hallway. I picked up my suitcase, a few boxes I wanted to keep and set them on my tables. I turned around and the water kept coming and coming....and it would not stop. All of a sudden I heard a lot of loud yelling in Portuguese and pretty quickly my room began to fill up with workers raking out the water. First, I ran to get my laptop and unplug and put up all the computer cords. I barely made it in time for the printer. It was almost ruined. I ran around picking up my carpets, mats, books, posters, bookshelves, tables, and chairs to which the water was up to my ankles. Luckily-I dont' think anything is going to be water damaged. I did however have to take everything off the walls by the windows-most of which was ruined. At the end, all I could do was start singing, "Showers of Blessings" and thank God for the sweet, cool rain he brought us. The next week is going to be hard, I know this. It's going to be hard for the kids because they no longer have a classroom and won't for an undisclosed amount of time. I don't think they will let us back in until they fix the problem. I understand that it will take double the work to have a "portable" classroom" but it's okay. No one is hurt, no one is sick, and this too shall pass. Soon-I will be back in my classroom. The next two picturea are what my room looked like right before I left today. The last picture is what my room looked like yesterday.

confessions of a possible green thumb......

2008-09-30T14:44:00.001-07:00

Well, we're learning ALL about plants this week :) I mean from putting beans in plastic bags to actually planting them-then learning the parts, the needs, etc. We're cutting and pasting like it's our jobs and successfully-it looks like a tornado hits the room every single day. But-they love it, I love it, and we are super nice to our janitorial staff.

Quote of the Day

Me-" Boys and Girls, when you read 25 books, you will get one of these great pencils (they aren't just ANY pencils with great big erasers with big-eyed animals on them)**Note** You can't get pencils with erasers on them here-they just don't make them**

Them-(silence) "wow" "look at that one" "oh, i want...."

Me-"James gets the first pencil!" "Congratulations for reading 25 books!"

Nicolas-"I'm gonna read 100 books-just like Jesus"

Me-"Well, I don't know how many books Jesus read, but I want you to be just like Him!"

Nicolas-"Yes, but I'm gonna read 100 books-just like Jesus"

Ahh, Kindergarten

From the Playground :

Here are three of my boys who would rather swing than do anything!!

Soccer- Huddle UP! :) I think these are 2nd graders!

the real confession...

2008-09-28T14:43:00.000-07:00

Well, church was quite interesting tonight. I got to hear "Negro Spirituals" in English and Portuguese.....by what happens to be one of the most beautiful and articulate choirs..maybe ever. Amazing. All the while, I was trying to ever so discreetly ward off the bugs. "Flying ants" my Brasilian friend says. They come after the rain, fly around kind of like they are drugs, and aggravate everyone. My questions was, "Do they bite?" "No?" But for some reason....the feeling of something crawling up your leg is not.....desirable. Anywho.

I finished my awesome Sunday School class today---I'm so sad---I have to find another one to attend. I'm not really sure what to do about that.

Here's the real confession...
So-you guys want to know my biggest struggle? I'm afraid that I'm a burden/distraction. To those who translate, the rest of the class (or the congregation), and this is so hard. I almost go to pieces every Sunday/church service about this.
Some of this is just normal "I'm living in a foreign country" stuff. The rest of it is an "independence" problem. The thoughts of depending on others is so scary for me. I have a terrible time with this. It is really hard and takes a lot of work to translate for someone. The translator sometimes gets next to nothing out of the service. I really struggle with that. I begin to think about their sacrificial giving-I do my best to thank them. I just don't feel like it is ever sufficient. One girl sacrifices her Saturday nights to do this for me.
I cannot explain my difficulty with these situations. I'm in a good place, with good people, and always a great Word from God (when I do have a translator).
You are thinking-wow-is this the biggest problem she has?
This is tortuous for an extrovert. Walking around without a clue how to talk to, respond to, and communicate with people-anywhere and everywhere.

In all of this, I'm learning to be dependant more on God to provide and put people in my life at just the right times (and He does). It's so hard to depend on people for so much. Think about it, I'm 26, not married, I'm living in a foreign country. That automatically makes me a tad bit independant. But what God is showing me is that it's not about my independence but it is all about how dependant I can be on Him. It wasn't my independence that got me here-it was Him. Do I trust Him? His provisions are always perfect. So-yeah-what am I stressing about? AH!

confessions from the lunchroom monitors...

2008-09-26T19:23:00.000-07:00

"Boys and girls, what day is it tomorrow?"
(Nicolas holds up his hand)
"Yes, Nicolas..."
(deep breath)
"Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, FRIIIIIIday, Saturday"

"Ms. Bolin" -Mr. Fryar (the "Principal of the Cafeteria" according to his son)
"Yes, Mr. Fryar.."
"Why do the kids call me Mr. Pancake?"
"I have no clue AND there is no song."

Mr.......Fryar......you've....got.......ants....in....your.......pants.. :)

My kids....have to be the most adorable, most creative, lively, and crazy group of kids. I love them more and more each day, talk about them like they are my own, live to see them succeed, and am stirred deep within to show them the love of Christ in every possible way.

confessions from the prayer journal!!!!

2008-09-18T17:54:00.000-07:00

HEY! Everyone!! This week has been totally hard-I won't lie. My kids have been out of their minds (which makes me out of mine) and it's just been a real week. But in saying all of that-I have to tell you that as hard as it is...I love my job.

But-the most amazing things have happened!
Praises!

I received my boxes from the states (haha-but they are being held in customs-we're gonna try to jew them down a bit on the price....)
My brother got a job interview at the prison in our hometown (I've been writing this request down for about 1 1/2 years now) Now, we just have to pray FOR the interview! He was so excited and yet nervous! I just told him to remember that God already knows what is going to happen!
I start Portuguese lessons on Monday with a Christian girl who must LOVE missionaries, teaching, and English. She suggested three days a week (WOW!-wasn't expecting that one) and I agreed :) She will be coming to my workplace! Ahh! I just feel so blessed and overjoyed-so many things at the same time!
IT RAINED again last night and this morning ;) You just don't know how good it feels when it rains here. The humidity is like 10% every day-no lie. Brasilia went over 100 days without rain and even now-the ground is dry before it really has a chance to be muddy. The cool breeze reminded me of fall in the states (but really here-it is like spring) and I loved it!

AHH! I'm just so amazed but I don't know why? God always provides exactly what I need and He answers those prayers for others as well. He's been pointing me to John 17 lately (like from every angle) and Jesus' "High Priestly Prayer". :) It is really cool to see it through a child's eyes, through a scholar, and then a peer. A-Mazing.

"My God is so BIG, so STRONG, and so MIGHTY, there's nothing that my God cannot DO! For YOU!" -my kids sing this like there is no tomorrow.....and so they should.

confessions of kindergarten humor....

2008-09-16T17:35:00.000-07:00

(Today is Monday)
Okay boys and girls, I love you guys, and I'll see you tomorrow.
Does anyone know what tomorrow is?
"Tomorrow is FRIDAY!"
Somedays---I wish they were right....

"um, Mr. Bowler, can....I....have...a....pencil?" -student A
"hahaha, it's Ms. Bolin!!!!"-student B
Yes, this is officially what one student called me for the first two weeks of school...the
one with all the languages.

Today, the Art teacher asked to have class in our room. I agreed and she brought in construction paper, stuffed dogs, etc for the students. They were "tearing" out shapes for their dogs and gluing the pieces to paper. She informs me that one of the dogs is anatomically correct and the student is admiting this. Upon my arrival at the desk-he had put a sweater on his dog.
That's right-when you're naked-put clothes on.

"Uummm....Teacher" (to which I respond-is my name teacher?" or "wow, someone changed my name)

So, one day the computer teacher is reading to my students (because the lab isn't finished) and they LOVE "No David!" so of course they con him into reading it to them for the 50th time that week. One on of the pages, David is picking his nose. Well, all the kids were like "Ewwwww, gross"...to which I looked over and said, "Right, and you all use tissues."

From across the lunchroom I see one of my students with his dirty fork walking toward the silverware bowl in the lunch line. I began to yell-"No, no, no" and walk quickly to the rescue of everyone else's forks--to no avail---Can I say "5 second rule?"

"bunnies and bubble tails" (bubbles and bunny tails keeps the kids from talking in the hall and from touching each other)

"Okay, we are going to do patterns today with the letters A and B" Let's say the pattern A, B, A, B
5 out of 6 students say "ABAB"
that 1 out of 6 starts singing "ABCDEFG" to which the rest of the class joins.
I-just stopped.

confessions of my anger with movie translators....and then a little at myself....

2008-09-13T20:33:00.000-07:00

So-it's been a reoccuring theme that when people are speaking to me-sometimes they say some odd things. Last week, one of the crazy guys at church said the American slang word for "jerk". You know what it is. We were at church and my jaw dropped. As I recomposed myself, the young man asked me what it meant. Looking at his face, I realized that he had no clue what he just said. I kindly explained what the word actually meant and his face dropped. Now, he was in shock. We were both heartbroken and maybe a bit embarrased. I didn't know who to be angry with-the American television or the Portuguese translators. That's right, just fluff it up, make it something it is not. Sounds like a nonliteral translation.........that's frustrating as well....

Anyways-I thought of Jenn Martin today as I walked through the Metro Station. This thumping began to run through my body as I walked closer to the open area. I thought for sure I had walked into the ghetto---and yet as I got closer--I began to laugh at myself. They were just break dancing. Someone set up a set of spinners and there were all of these people sitting and standing in a circle. In turn, they were on their heads, their sides, feet in the air-kind of like hip hop gumby or something.

Almost as funny as I was walking in the supermarket the other night and this annoying, BLARING music was coming from the front of the cash registers. After a few trips up and down the isle--I look over--and it's a guy playing a keyboard and singing karaoke in English. "Nuh uh" came out of my mouth as I continued shopping (and once again laughing). I needed that good laugh after one of those "hard" days.

Every other Friday night, we have a service for the Youth of our school. This service includes praise & worship, some crazy fellowship, and an astounding message from Chris Fryar (our school financial director and his other position is "Principal of the Cafeteria"-according to his son, Caleb). Chris began to see the need for the students to get real with God. To get real with their actions, their idols, their insecurities, their thoughts, and their lives in general. Apparently some of them have given in to the world during the summer. The staff is broken and concerned for the students as there have been other factors worked into this equation as well-such as the Muslim family (yes parents and all) that attended, the Brazilian girls, and a few others. I know God can do whatever He wants and will use whomever He wants...
"Take me past the outer courts, into the holy place,
Past the brazen alter, Lord I want to see your face,
Take me past the crowds of people and priests who sing your face
I hunger and thirst for your righteousness and I've only found one place.."

Chris talked about the students' reasons for being there every other week. He asked them to
evaluate their lives for the sake of God. He was talking in context of coming to Smash....But-It really made me stop and think a bit about my own selfish motives for certain things in my life. I am really praying that I will seek to serve God better by seeking to serve others well. Serving others when it isn't convenient for me. Service always with a cheerful giving heart. I think I can get bogged down with "stuff" which makes service to others tiring and inconvenient for me. I am directed to the verses in Matthew 25-And the King will answer them, 'Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.'-when someone is need. I should be ready to serve anytime-anyone-without complaint.

On a lighter note-I experienced my first power outage this week-While I was in the shower at 5 am one morning. Quite hilarious. Thank the Lord for decisions NOT to wash hair and for candles in tins ( I told you guys I would need them!!). I opened my computer for light and amazingly enough put on makeup and finished getting ready! Oh the things you can do!!

confessions of 4 1/2 year olds on the green carpet

2008-09-09T17:47:00.000-07:00

So-today-I bravely layed out our paperback classroom Bibles (fearful of what would happen to them) and anxiously awaited the arrival of my students.
I obviously didn't understand their view of reverance.
I always read from the Bible to them and read verses out of the Bible. I really didn't know if they could actually hold their Bibles and listen to a story without ripping the pages, throwing them around, sitting on them, etc. (all the things I've seen them do with my books).
Wow, God is so great-He is so wondrous. They knew what they were holding. In the innocence of their minds-they carefully looked at the pictures, flipped through the pages, and some even began unfolding some of the tattered and folded pages. When we held them-it was like a silent hush fell over the kids as they each received this huge book.
As I was reading the story-they began looking at the pages and as this perturbed me, I stopped to listen to what they were saying. One of my 4 1/2 year olds said, "Look-this is Jesus-he is still on the cross." Grasping this teachable moment I said, "No, Jesus is not on the cross. He is with God the Father in heaven." Upon this, we went through the whole story. My little Zambian was on it-she told him all about how Jesus was punished for our sins(think Passion of the Christ) to which I began to talk about sin and what this was. We talked about how Jesus was perfect (and in the conversation someone said, "Yeah, he never pinched or hit his friends." This was so profound to a couple of them. I should also share that they had this "nuh uh" moment the other day when I told them that we are all sinful from birth-from the time we are babies. I mean their looks said it all (some even dropped the jaw)---they were astonished at this concept.
I'm almost certain that two of my students do not attend church and from their responses-we are not really sure what their religious views are at home. I will say though, that one of them sings Jesus Loves Me like it's going out of style and the other BEGS to pray before lunch. Simply amazing. God can do whatever He wants.
"All God's children singing, Glory, Glory, Hallelujah He Reigns, He Reigns"-this rolls off their tongues at least four times a day (depending on the CD rotation) and Hosanna (Christy Nockels) is beginning to go from hummms to words-they also love Kari Jobe -and Shawn McDonald makes them wiggle in their seats. I'll tell you though, the ones that love it the most are the two with the rather sketchy backgrounds.
Pray for them and for their families that I would have the chance to show them all Christ and just share God's love and truth with them as the occasions arise.

confessions about a hymn-hater

2008-09-08T14:09:00.000-07:00

So, today, someone said to me, "I really don't like hymns. I sang them when I was young and they have no meaning." I almost hit the roof. Grant it-I have only (in the past couple of years) begun to really appreciate the profound meaning of specific hymns. Once I was saved, I really started to understand what I was singing about and how these hymns are lyrical pictures of Christ, grace, salvation, and so many other things. "Nothing But the Blood", "Standing on the Promises", "Come Thou Fount", "Blessed Assurance", "Victory in Jesus",-the list goes on and on. Then there are the ones that have been redone-"Jesus Lover of My Soul", "Jesus Paid it All", "On Jordan's Stormy Banks", "How Deep the Father's Love"-the list goes on and on and on.
I don't think I needed to say anything to this person-I think the look said it all. As Tiffany Hardin says, "Judgemental Eyes". I feel terrible and then I don't. I don't feel terrible for feeling this way about the great words of hymns past. How could you be a hymn-hater or an "Unlover of Hymns?"
There are some really great Contemporary Praise and Worship Songs out, but man, to totally discard the hymns?
I appreciate them now more than ever. I'm hearing them in church and for the most part they are the only songs that I know. I know the words I'm saying and when the choir sings-I can just close my eyes and visualize the words. It feels so good to be a hymn-lover.

Prayer Requests:

Staff family members are afflicted with different things-viruses, cancer, homesickness, organ failure, etc.
My Granny as she is dealing with her foot swelling again. She is not able to have an operation to correct this-so she has to deal with it as it comes and goes.
Staff members waitign for visas: Aundrea and Michael Taylor and our newest teacher-Stephanie Downing :)
Graduates of BIS-as they go to college (some are not saved but are deeply influenced by BIS)-some of them are going to Muslim communities to live while they attend college.
Challenges of learning Portuguese (But I am learning)-praying for a Portuguese tutor.....
A Youth Conference being held here Sept. 25-27th and the Outreaches that will take place before.
Mary Wolford, as she is working with in orphanages and facilitating discipleship relationships with the people there!
For lost relatives, friends, and students.

Praises:

The dollar is strengthening! 1.72 today! (which is a praise-it makes our support go further)
For my Supporters-THANK YOU!!!!! I appreciate your diligence :) Also-thank you to those who are new supporters :)
For those whom are sent to me in the form of interpretors on Sunday morning. I pray so hard for this-I am attending a really phenomenal Sunday School class and they are so persistant in finding me an interpretor every single Sunday morning. I don't even have to ask-they just come. This is giving me a chance to meet different people and foster some amazing relationships.
For my beautiful students-their beautiful character-and their amazing perspectives....I am so blessed to be here serving God.

confessions of a childhood fav. hymn and Hell.

2008-09-01T13:45:00.000-07:00

Brethren, we have met to worship and adore the Lord our God;Will you pray with all your power, while we try to preach the Word?All is vain unless the Spirit of the Holy One comes down;Brethren, pray, and holy manna will be showered all around.
Brethren, see poor sinners round you slumbering on the brink of woe;Death is coming, hell is moving, can you bear to let them go?See our fathers and our mothers, and our children sinking down;Brethren, pray and holy manna will be showered all around.
Sisters, will you join and help us? Moses’ sister aided him;Will you help the trembling mourners who are struggling hard with sin?Tell them all about the Savior, tell them that He will be found;Sisters, pray, and holy manna will be showered all around.
Is there here a trembling jailer, seeking grace, and filled with tears?Is there here a weeping Mary, pouring forth a flood of tears?Brethren, join your cries to help them; sisters, let your prayers abound;Pray, Oh pray that holy manna may be scattered all around.
Let us love our God supremely, let us love each other, too;Let us love and pray for sinners, till our God makes all things new.Then He’ll call us home to Heaven, at His table we’ll sit down;Christ will gird Himself and serve us with sweet manna all around.

Ah, thank you Dr. Orrick for reminding me (some time ago) of this childhood favorite hymn and then Erito again leaving it on my facebook :)

In Sunday School we're studying about Hell:
A bit from Calvin:
But we must seek a surer explanation, apart from the Creed, of Christ’s descent into hell. The explanation given to us in God’s Word is not only holy and pious, but also full of wonderful consolation. If Christ had died only a bodily death, it would have been ineffectual. No — it was expedient at the same time for him to undergo the severity of God’s vengeance, to appease his wrath and satisfy his just judgment. For this reason, he must also grapple hand to hand with the armies of hell and the dread of everlasting death. f439
John Owen:
"Do you mortify? Do you make it your daily work? Be always at it whilst you live; cease not a day from this work; be killing sin or it will be killing you."
Jean-Paul Sartre:
"Every existing thing is born without reason, prolongs itself out of weakness, and dies by chance."
"Existence precedes and rules essence."
"One always dies too soon or too late. And yet, life is there, finished: the line is drawn, and it must all be added up. You are nothing other than your life.

Oh Mr. Sartre.....I grieve much for those who are in that condition.

I was also reminded of the unfortunate circumstance of egocentrism-Man seeing God as his servant rather than the truth.
Oh-to recognize the truth and yet I wonder how we could forget?

To my father and anyone else...... I labored on this day.

confessions of a "gringa"

2008-08-31T09:36:00.000-07:00

Last night I attended a service for the Youth (ages 18-35; single, married, couples, everything) and it was amazing! I went last week as well and I abosolutely love it! I went with the BIS secretary and her sister. They did an amazing job interpreting! They are also teaching me so much about the language and I feel completely comfortable asking them questions about "frequently heard words". These can be funny times. Last night I asked what "fica" meant...and that means "fling" haha. I'm pretty sure I was getting it confused with "fila" which is a verb for something (can't remember, brain overload). I say all of this to say that they are hosting a conference (which is from what I can tell an outreach ministry to specific sections of the city) and I'm praying about how I can help. I know that they need people to support, pray, and work during the conference which is the last week in September!
The pastor there, his son is at Southern Seminary! The Brasilians were telling me last night that there are two great schools in the U.S -Southern and Southwestern. They said that there were a lot of smart people at Southern-and I whole heartedly agreed with them. My friend said, "They say Southern is the best in the world." Wow. All the way in Brasilia they think this and it is in our backyard. How blessed are we to have such a mighty fortress of believers who won't compromise the word (and teaches their students the same).
And one last bit of news from last night----IT RAINED!!!!! We were all so happy! They announced it at the end of church and we all rushed out to see the sprinkles on the sidewalk. We haven't had any rain in over 100 days. Everything is dead and dry-you can see the dust on your skin at the end of the day. Maybe I'll no longer have to perform my ceremonial feet washing in the sink before I crawl in bed everynight. I wear shoes and it is almost as if I never even put shoes on my feet. It feels like fall in Kentucky-cool, breezy, a bit of rain. I LOVED it! The Brasilians are walking around freezing and I am loving the familiarity of it all! Thank you, Lord, for the early (very very early) start to rainy season-I was getting tired of the nose bleeds!

In School this week (3rd week):
We are learning about Days 4-6 in Creation. They get stuck on one day and forget about the other days. It's difficult sometimes, but we go to the "Creation Station" (there's a paper for every day showing pictures of what God created) and talk about each poster.
I had a most interesting conversation with one of my kids. I was asking him to speak a bit of Portuguese to his (Portuguese only) classmate.
"I no want to."
"You don't want to? Why?" I asked.
"Well, I just don't."
We bantered a minute about languages and finally I said,"How many languages do you speak?"
"I have three." "Portuguese, Spanish, and the one I'm speaking now."

I could only laugh. If you could see his sweet face......ahh Kindergarten. It is such a challenge for some students because many of them know more than two languages. One of my four year olds knows 3 languages (see above :) ) and the other one is fluent in 3 (Spanish, Portuguese, and English) and can speak in 2 more (Greek and French). Talk about insane?! At four years old?! I usually give directions about three different ways for these students in hopes that they will understand or follow someone else. I can't imagine trying to dig through my brain to find the English words when there are 4 other languages floating around in there....

My students are so wonderful-and-they are now accustomed to walking in the line! They can do it! "Bubbles and Bunny Tails" It's pretty hilarious to watch, but the 1st grade teacher is getting ready to recruit me to come and show her kids how to walk in a line!

Culture:
Yesterday I got my first haircut and I went by myself. Why? You ask? I just wanted to see if I could do it. So-bravely, I found a salon that was seemingly friendly, yet cozy. They are a dime a dozen here (worse than in the states) so I just walked up and down the Quadras until I found a hair supply store and the salon was underneath. I slowly walked downstairs and showed them the word for "trim" to which they asked one of the girls (Amanda as well....) to translate. So-in just a few minutes, I was getting my hair washed and cut. Graca (Grasa) did an AMAZING job! I was so nervous but she took her time and asked questions when needed. I made a couple new friends and an appointment for next month with her. Oh-and I love the complimentary coffee and water that is served as you get your hair done!!

Also-I started to notice about the culture is that both men and women wear gold engagement rings on the right hands (until they are married). Most of the younger couples (like my generation) they also wear silver rings when they start dating seriously. I asked my friend why the men wear them and she said, "We want EVERYONE to know that they are taken." Which I thought was hysterically funny. She will be getting married within the next year-depending on when the government calls her fiance into a job (He scored very high on a test to get into the Supreme Court-but now he could wait up to 2 years to get a job). These jobs are few and far between and many Brasilians try and fail the tests every year. They study for days, hours, months at a time once they apply to take the test. You basically have it made if you get one of these jobs-many want-few get. They give you a VERY nice salary plus food, gas, and GREAT work hours. Anyway-there's a little Brasilian culture for you.....

Open House-International Style...

2008-08-22T18:29:00.000-07:00

Well, I will say that people in Brazil know how to have an Open House-they just don't know how to shut it down.

I saw the most colorful, beautiful array of people tonight from all different backgrounds. Breathtaking-like a sunset or a beautiful mountain range. Everywhere you looked-a different nation represented.

It was completely amazing! I talked with four of my six parents-and I'm only unsure about the salvation of two sets of parents. One set I see all the time and the other set is rather difficult to communicate with. So-much prayer is requested for those situations.

Zambia(student representatives) was absent tonight-which meant that I was one student and set of parents short. Their President died-so they could not attend. Levy Mwanawasa was much respected and loved by his people. I even received a note in one of the students' agenda about the great sorrow they (the people of Zambia) are experiencing.

The catering was amazing-complete with caviar, guacamole (with CHIPS-yum!!), quite exquisite shrimp(yum!), and so many other things...and that was the adult dishes (that were being served to us...) and then there was the kids table. I don't even know if I have words to describe the Willie Wonka type smorgasbord of jinormous lollipops, candies, marshmallows, chocoloate shots, sprinkles, suckers, sweets. By the end of the night-I'm sure there were some sick children walking around! It was quite the experience....from the international community. And that experience lasted until 10:30 last night.....turning the lights out just doesn't work here. :)

Everything you need to know, you learned in Kindergarten...

2008-08-14T17:52:00.000-07:00

Wow-I so agree with this statement. There are innumberable experiences (today alone) which make me believe every word of this! Kindergarten is before most of the world taints your view of life, love, and color. You begin to realize differences and immediately you can see how each person will treat these differences. :) Sometimes it is actually how someone teaches your "perspective" on these topics.....

Beginning with bus duty-these are not just any buses-they are Embassy buses from Zambia, America, and a couple of others. It is quite different than the United States-for sure!

Today, not 5, or 6, but 10 smiling faces greeted me at the door :) The Pre-K and Kindergarten are meeting together for a few days while the Pre-K room is being finished. I love, love, love the Pre-K teacher-she is amazing! She is the most diligent and sacrificial person that I know. She set her classroom up and they tore it down-now she is with me for a couple of days. In true Christlike fashion-she truly takes whatever He gives her and makes the best. I'm learning a lot from her....and I'm so thankful for her.

So-officially I will have 6 students for half a day and 7 for the last half. One of my students only speaks Portuguese-so-guess who is practicing? Or actually, guess who is teaching me? I know a few things well enough to get me through the day-like no touching, sit, and some other commands.

They are all so beautiful, colorful, a bit audacious, and completely accomodating to our crazy mixed classroom! I love their little faces!

This is our "silly" picture!

Well, one of my favorite mission kids-Brody (a cool name for a cool kid!) and I went to the Pizza place-at his request. I ordered all in Portuguese (even his juice), got ice (you have to ask for it), asked for the check, and everything! Plus-I'm kind of starting to build some relationships with the people there. They help me with words and guide my pronunciation when it is not just right. My Thursday night spot! I also tend to take the kids into a specific drug store (for little whatnots) on Thursdays-and the owner speaks English, Spanish, and Portuguese-so I can speak whatever language I choose! Yet another relationship!

Weird thing of the week-I tend to think of words in Spanish-a lot. So-a lot of times, I just go ahead and try it-sometimes this works. I just think it's funny that I can immediately think of almost everything I need to say-in Spanish (and I didn't think I knew very much-THANK YOU CUBA!)...... I think the fact that I use English at school, at home, and around most of the people I know-is very hindering to learning Portuguese.

Alllllmost Finished :)

2008-08-11T18:07:00.001-07:00

This is what I did today :) Actually, I've been looking at it for several days now and just wondering... :) Oh but ye of little faith! I stood in complete awe as they came and hung my bulletin boards, helped unpack my boxes, and clean my furniture. Today was so sweet.

Tomorrow-I have to decorate ALL of those bulletin boards (3 to be exact) and then my Morning Meeting Area as well (you know-calendar stuff, counting, colors-the stuff I live for!).

And-right across the hall are the cutest "mini-potties" that you will ever see. A sight to behold folks! We are truly blessed as a school to be able to offer these amenities to the students. We went from a patio-to a church-to a mansion-now this.

Blessed. I know that's what our administrators feel. I know that's what I feel.

And-this is Elise (one of my fav missionary kids)-we went for our one-on-one time to this FANTABULOUS pizza place. We ordered a "Bacon Pizza" because that was the only words I understood on the menu. And-I also understood the ice cream bar in the back of the restaurant :) It was like a salad bar- except with tons of ice cream, toppings, drippings, and neat edible straws! More than that-she shared that she thinks motorcycles are scary because they don't have training wheels (and they should) and her brother is six and doesn't have a clue.

2008-08-09T09:46:00.000-07:00

Today at Portuguese Church-they called in the troops! I had not one, not two, but three different translators before they figured out which one could stay. I was so embarrassed but relieved that I would be able to understand the pastor (who was teaching). He taught out of Ecc. on the subject of the Death and Dominion. God put us here with a ticket of death in our hands. We cannot avoid it, figure it out, or really understand it. Sunday School was very interesting as people brought up the topics of suicide, almost death experiences, etc. It's a bit neat to watch Brasillian preachers get fired up!
Tonight, we took communion and towards the end-I watched Repentence take place in a young man's life. We've been watching him for several weeks. He appeared back at church the same night that I first came. He walked away from the church several years ago-several weeks ago, his father died. The repercussions of this event are glorious in some ways. It was somewhat beautiful to watch him cry out to Jesus tonight in the silence of communion.
I saw Batman or "Batcheman" as they call it in Brazil. Wow-I was amazed-not at the darkness, the cunning Morgan Freeman, or even the late Heath Ledger's go at the Joker. I was most impressed with the script.

Endure, Master Wayne. Take it. They'll hate you for it. But that's the point of Batman, he can be the outcast. He can make the choice that no one else can make, the right choice.

....and the script got better and better.
This week
I got roommates-Megan(2nd grade teacher) and Melinda(3/4th grade teacher). It's been a great adjustment. They are teaching me a lot about life here and how to survive! It was good to have them as my first bout of culture shock surfaced this week. Sometimes you know something in your head, but it doesn't fully settle. This is how I felt about Brazil being my home. The head knowledge finally made it's way to a concrete understanding. It's funny how those things hit you! I really love it here-it's different, surreal, can be a bit complicated because of simplicity, grocery shopping is NOT the same, I still can't cook..... God continues to use these things to draw me closer to Himself. What is a discouragement one day can be used as a blessing the next. In hindsight I love those experiences.
I started my job! We began inservice by painting, "moshing" (or massa?), cleaning, carrying boxes, and avoiding the flying rubble from the Brasillian workers running around. The projects are reaching a finish line and we can see the light! The majority of our classrooms are close to completion and focusing on the students has come to the forefront.
I realized exactly what "early" means-as we began to get up at about 5:45am every morning! Well-small confession to those who don't know me-I don't sleep well and therefore-the morning is not my favorite time of the day! My sleeping patterns are being shifted and it's becoming habit to get up so early in the morning! We (the other single-Melinda, Megan, and Casey) catch the bus about 6:20 every morning. I came to realize that we have a group of homeless people that sleep in the park next to us. I noticed them before, but the reality hit me as we walked by them the other morning. You can't miss their loud colored blankets. Almost everyone was covered from head to toe-just like they were camping. The destruction of that thought is that they are not. They will roll up their blankets and continue a harsh cycle of begging. They wake up the same as I, breathe in their nostrils, and seemingly for them, there is no vision of hope. I am exploring options to help them-e-mailing people for Portuguese tracks, gathering ideas from my roommates, and just praying for them. They are my neighbors and I should tend to their needs.

Next Week-
Fixing up the classroom (whoohooo), having meetings, and Thursday-one of our mission fields will be up and running (the school :)

Prayer Requests
BIS-students, parents, teacher, construction, administration
For new and growing relationships!
For continual wisdom
Mare-She should be in South Africa soon!
Culture Shock!
Language Barrier
Michael and Aundrea Taylor's Visa (3rd grade teacher)
Situations at home

Praises
Progress on the new school
Growing relationships
The Martin's

Two weeks in Africa...

2008-08-04T17:56:00.000-07:00

Johannesburg to Capetown
the plane had barely touched down
she was taking photos for the friends back home
this was always where she felt her heart belonged
and she was finally here
the sky was bright and clear

I think of my best friend, Mary, when I hear this song. Her heart beats for the nation of Africa. The song goes on to say two weeks-and this week she left for 5 1/2 months. The ardor for these people radiates from every part of her. I'm truly blessed to have a best friend going out. I couldn't count the conversations we've had about missions. The quality in those alone-accounts for the encouragement and the fanning of those flames in our lives. I miss her, but I know God's got this (actually always had it).

I realized not too long ago that I've never read the Bible all the way through-in a consistent manner. So-under the advice of Donald Whitney-I've started reading one chapter per day in several places-Genesis, Job, Proverbs, Matthew, and then Nehemiah( I just started this one today). It's been great to review the promises of God, watch perserverance, answer questions of wisdom, and go through the life of Jesus. Already, this journey is amazing. Shame on me for not doing this before now.

Church is going well-I understand more Portuguese there than I do anywhere else. It is very different, but my ears are becoming accustomed to words and phrases. I think the pastors are going to work out something so that I will have access to the sermons before the services. So-hopefully we can work something out.

Today, my apartment became full again! I am so thankful for the two girls that God has placed in my life. I'm praying that our relationships grow and that we can be pictures of encouragement, grace, and help during this time.

Prayer Requests
new Brasilian friends
Language Barriers
BIS-students, staff, and construction
Scott and Stacey Bose (administrators)
Aundrea and Michael Taylor's Visa
Mare in South Africa
CrossPoint Baptist and Bro. Randy
Relationships

Praises
All of our staff made it!
Mary made it to Tanzania
Construction progress on the new school
Good church here!

2008-07-31T13:12:00.000-07:00

I watched as my sweet missionary girls left this morning! Through hugs, gifts, and trying to figure out whose clothes were in what bag-they made it out the door.
There is something about young missionaries. They know that they have to go back, but the possibilities for the future are endless. They have been preparing the field for the harvest. They worked extremely hard to help us provide an ideal environment for our students. They were relentless in their vision of starting and completing each assigned task. I really can't wait to see what God does with the school and in each of their lives.
I attended a Portuguese church last Sunday. It was awesome! I recognized several old hymns and new praise songs. I met several girls that speak English and have agreed to help me along during the services! Yay! They are so sweet and eager to help me! I really like the pastor-through interpretation-his sermon was on the Bread of Life. He called us to evaluate our lives and ask ourselves-if we worked half as hard to obtain spiritual food as we do physical-where would we be? Hmm.

I worked with the group this week at the old building-painting, painting, and more painting! It took about five coats per wall! Also-they moved most of the furniture, curriculum materials, and other things to the new school!!! We will have a lot to do on August 5th (inservice starts) in order to get things organized, arranged, and ready for the students. The construction continues :)

2008-07-25T20:33:00.000-07:00

These are some pictures from the new school(my classroom) as well as the old one.

There is tons to enjoy here, but the sunsets are completely mesmorizing.

I've been spending a lot of time with missionary kids-and I love them! Say Hi to Brody, Elise, and Melinia

The old building is exciting, amazing, and under construction. I visited twice this week and the changes were amazing :) Everyone is working so hard to get it ready for August 14th!

This week:

The group from Pennsylvania is completely amazing-I love the girls who are staying with me. I am going to be so sad when they leave! They have such a heart for God and the beauty of servanthood radiates from them! I absolutely have had an amazing time working, living, and laughing with them!

I learned how to ride the bus (funny-right?) and I was able to take it home by myself! That's exciting in a foreign country!

I'm not sure of the lesson I've learned with the laundry-all I know is that it is dripping (literally) dry in the service quarters after I have washed them in the machine.....

I'm working on establishing relationships with Brasilians and looking for a Brasilian church to attend!

Prayer Requests:

BIS-school construction, staff coming back, students, and our start date-Aug 14th
Michael and Aundrea Taylor-for their visa!
Mary Wolford-going to South Africa to serve God!
CrossPoint Baptist and Bro. Randy as they pursue serving Richmond and helping people to realize that God is the "God of their city"
Continual patience

Praises:
The walls came down at the old BIS building this week! It's beginning to look like a house!
All the new stuff at the new building!
Forming great relationships!

What can I say?

2008-07-18T18:03:00.000-07:00

The lump of joy welled up in my throat as the last plane touched down in Brasilia. I wanted to scream and cry (for joy!)at the same time.
From there, the Boses, Jetter's, and the Livingston's greeted me. I began to put personalities with faces and faces with names.
Brasilia is beautiful-even in the dead of winter. It was love at first sight for me as I breathed the crisp/warm air and began taking in my surroundings. I visited (what is now) the old school and again placed familiar pictures with actual classrooms. The old school does have a wonderful view-just not enough wonderful rooms.
I have yet to explore the new school-I'm sure that will come very soon. We will begin the big move next week after the mission team arrives on Tuesday. I will be hosting 3 young ladies in the apartment-so that should be FUN! The apartment-is simple, safe, and has much character. The windows are HUGE and the rooms carry a breeze quite nicely. The children also brought to my attention that the floor is excellent for playing "skates". I'm sure I will kill myself on the "skating" floor before it is over :)

Prayer Requests:
**For the Missions team from Pennsylvania coming to help with the construction of the new school
**For the construction team and the swift finish so we can start school in our new building!!
**For boldness as I learn to interact with the people and speak their language in order to establish relationships with them.
**For Mary as she is getting ready for South Africa

Praises
**Well, I'm here!
**For wonderful families who are offering to have me over for supper :)
**For the Bose family-they showed me some wonderful hospitality in getting me the things I needed today :)

Newsletter 1

2008-07-15T07:47:00.001-07:00

Dear Family/Friends,
I am so overwhelmed by your outpouring of love, encouragement, support, prayers, and gifts. Please know that each comment, card, call, and act of service is deeply appreciated. I recently acquired my visa and didn’t waste any time booking an airline ticket. Finally, after 9 months, I am scheduled to leave on July 17th from Cincinnati.
I attended training in Southaven, Mississippi with about 164 other missionaries and their families.. I learned about teaching, culture, communicating, transitioning, students, and resources-just to name a few. Through the training, God showed me some great things and really prepared me for the next two years at Brasilia International School. I am fortunate to be serving with the Network of Christian Schools.
I carry bits and pieces of you with me all the time. The beginning feelings of joy and excitement are conflicting with sadness as I’m missing you all. Thank you for all of the beautiful memories over the last few months and over a lifetime. I am so appreciative to God and to you all as He worked through your lives to impact mine.
Many of you have prayer cards. The address on these cards is no longer correct. They moved the three single girls into an apartment closer to our new school. I will send you the school address as soon as possible. It will be easier for me to get all my mail there (since I will be there the majority of my time). Thank you for your diligence to pray-God has blessed me immensely. Also, God provided a new school for us! We went from two small houses to a 53 classroom building!!!
I will be communicating through mail on a monthly basis. This will allow me to share what is going on in the school as well as relay prayer requests and praises as they occur. Please do not hesitate to drop me a note or send me an e-mail if there are things that I can pray about. I am definitely excited about staying in touch and hearing about how God is working in your lives. Please drop me notes, pictures, and e-mails telling me how you are doing. I will always want to hear from you. I don’t want to come home at Christmas and not know what is going on in your lives.
In Christ Alone,
Amanda Bolin <><>

Pre-Field Orientation

2008-06-30T10:32:00.000-07:00

Well, the first week went off without a hitch!! I really love most of the sessions and felt challenged to embrace these things! I am completely amazed at the wealth of information being presented. There are several aspects of International teaching that I did not realize! I am truly grateful to the NICS for making us come and giving us a relaxed venue to understand these cultural, personal, and teaching differences. I'm glad that everything worked out this way-in order for me to attend this orientation. God knows what He is doing! (of course!). I think I would have been a bit of a mess without all of this!

I am also networking and learning how to be a roommate (like literally in the same room) with several (5) people at a time. I walked in unsure how this was going to work and questioning a lot of things. Upon giving it up to God-it works very well. Our personalities and lives seemed so different at first. (We all have Jesus in common-of course) Then-within a moment of mentioning a childhood favorite movie-"Anne of Green Gables"-we've begun to really spend the last part of our day (every day) watching this together-in community. We do lots of other things in community as well-Bible Studies (love them), corporate worship, our sessions, breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and then taking random "field trips-as i call them" to be good little tourists. This has been excellent for us as we realize what we will deal with overseas.

1 Peter has been the focus for Bible Studies this week. We've been looking at self-control, humility, hospitality, love, and hope. I think we're all walking around seriously evaluating ourselves in order to better serve others. That is what all of this is about-Who we are, how we can use our strengths, what we need to work on, and how God can use all of this to glorify Himself. There is glory in our weaknesses and shortcomings-when we see that these areas require much prayer. I find that I lean on Him more and more when assessing my weaknesses.
On Wednesday, we will talk about "suffering victouriously which brings many opportunities to think about great heroes of the faith in the Bible and today. :)

More Later!!!!

Mrs. C. H. Spurgeon

2008-05-09T10:11:00.000-07:00

:) I was reading up on Spurgeon today and came upon an online copy of his wife's biography. Beautifully written and eloquently expressed her feelings as well as his throughout their lives.
It is so encouraging to read about women like Mrs. Spurgeon and the experiences she had throughout her life being a wife to such an amazing man.

“Ah!” wrote Mrs. Spurgeon in after years, “how little I then thought that my eyes looked on him who was to be my life’s beloved; how little I dreamed of the honor God was preparing for me in the near future! It is a mercy that our lives are not left for us to plan, but that our Father chooses for us; else might we sometimes turn away from our best blessings, and put from us the choicest and loveliest gifts of His providence. For, if the whole truth be told, I was not at all fascinated by the young orator’s eloquence, while his countrified manner and speech excited more regret than reverence. Alas, for my vain and foolish heart! I was not spiritually-minded enough to understand his earnest presentation of the Gospel and his powerful pleading with sinners; - but the huge, black satin stock, the long badly-trimmed hair, and the blue pocket handkerchief with white spots which he himself has so graphically described, - these attracted most of my attention and I fear awakened some feelings of amusement. There was only one sentence of the whole sermon which I carried away with me, and that solely on account of its quaintness, for it seemed to me an extraordinary thing for the preacher to speak of the ‘living stones in the Heavenly Temple perfectly joined together with the vermilion cement of Christ’s blood.’”

Interested in the book as a whole? http://www.biblebb.com/files/SPURGEON/mrsspur.htm
I highly recommend it!

Notes from Nepal

2008-05-06T05:38:00.000-07:00

My father sent this e-mail to me late last night. He is teaching in a seminary in Nepal and witnessing some pretty crazy things. I imagine that all the years of reading about Baal in the Old Testament has conceptualized for him in these days. I'm not sure of their choice of worship-but seemingly it is the same.

Deuteronomy 4:15-19
15 "Therefore watch yourselves very carefully. Since you saw no form on the day that the LORD spoke to you at Horeb out of the midst of the fire, 16beware lest you act corruptly by making a carved image for yourselves, in the form of any figure, the likeness of male or female, 17the likeness of any animal that is on the earth, the likeness of any winged bird that flies in the air, 18the likeness of anything that creeps on the ground, the likeness of any fish that is in the water under the earth. 19And beware lest you raise your eyes to heaven, and when you see the sun and the moon and the stars, all the host of heaven, you be drawn away and bow down to them and serve them, things that the LORD your God has allotted to all the peoples under the whole heaven

Carol and Amanda,
Just a small email to let you know that we made it to Kathmandu and things are going well. The filights went so good and the hospitality is off the charts. We are going to Cimara by small plane this morning to the place where we will teach the pastors.We went to a Hidu temple last night and watched Hindu people cremate the bodies of their loved ones. It was an eye opener. IN China the temples and altars were numerous but there wasn't a lot going on there because these where just museum peices and not real places of worship. Communism had taught the people that there is no God so tourist come and spend money to see these places but no real worship is going on there. Here they have the temples and the incense burning but it is not a show. They are serious about their paganism. I have so much to say that I will share when I get home. Keep Nepal in your prayers.I love you all and will email again soon.loveKen

I responded to Dad saying that these people may bow down and worship these things, but this is what we do as well. Ours is disguised in boats, clothes, ornate buildings, celebrities, and so many other material things. We do not bow down and literally worship-but we hold these things above God and allow ourselves to worship them by taking our attention and time away from God and the things important to God. It causes me to question what may be a crutch in my life.....

85

2008-04-24T19:22:00.000-07:00

After walking 10 blocks to the Consulate-I took a number and began to catch my breath. 59, 60, 61 appeared on the digital board as I thumbed my 85. It was growing closer and closer to noon and it seemed like the room got smaller and smaller as the crowd multiplied. When the number 85 finally materialized-I somehow ended up at the window. I explained my business (It had been four months and I needed my passport) to which he basically said you left your passport and you are just now picking it up. He and I went around about three times until I finally convinced him that they had called for it. He finally told me to use the phone in the office to call the lady in charge of my case. Upon calling her, I was shocked to find out that she would bring my passport right down. I was definitely not expecting these actions. She brought the passport and said it should only be a couple more weeks. I assured her that when she called-I would send my passport back to them. I walked out feeling most confused. Why would the office dodge all of my phone calls and send me on wild goose chases for days and weeks at a time? All I know is this is what God wants. I don't know why He wanted it to be this way-but I am still here. I put my trust that He knows better and is always at work!
I almost left DC feeling like I got nothing accomplished. I decided to call them this morning to find out some more information (some names, phone numbers, direct contacts in Brazil). I called several times and there were no answers. After a few minutes of thoughts-I called my favorite lady's number back. She informed me that my case was turned back over to her. She sent my visa application to Brazil and it should be next week. I'll admit-I was a bit numb to this information. **Many of you know that I have heard all kinds of excuses, time spans, explanations, etc.** After that, I phoned Daniel (in charge of visa affairs in Brazil) and he was pretty excited about this information. He said this is what we have been waiting on! I began to get pretty excited as well!! We talked for a moment and he said that he was on his way to a meeting about my case with the Minister of Foreign Affairs. He assured me that there was nothing else I could do and that I could come on home! I felt so much better about leaving!

In -DC-there is always something great to do, something awesome to learn, and somewhere new to explore. This time-I learned more about God's timing, being faithful, and again "There is a reason!"

Prayer Requests

The White's-their adoption journey, birth mother, baby, financial, other adoption routes.
Missionaries being sent out this summer-Aaron King, Stewart Miles, Mary Wolford, Julie Lasslo, CrossPoint Baptist Church Youth (going to MFUGE)
People at the Brazilian Consulate in US and for those in Brazil.
My patience and continued seeking the Lord in delays, distractions, etc.
More Short term jobs
Lost friends

Praise

The movement of my Visa Application to Brazil!!!!
Daniel Lopes (the guy in charge of visa stuff in Brazil)-his little daughter was thought to have cancer-but it is all BENIGN!!! :) He was so glad to tell me this news today!!!
Short term jobs being provided.
Another Cuban friend made it to the United States! Adrian is living in Pheonix, Arizona and is doing well!

Oh the Places You'll Go

2008-04-22T21:33:00.001-07:00

Congratulations!

Today is your day.

You're off to Great Places!

You're off and away!

Day 1
In an effort to retain my passport (hopefully-if they haven't lost it) and information on my visa, I have traveled to Washington, DC. We made it into town about 2pm and after a few seconds of readjusting to public transportation maps (The Metro) we headed on the Blue Line towards the Consulate (which is about an hour from our hotel-with all the Metro stops and switches). I think we looked a bit out of place because he spotted us. We weren't looking at a map or doing the other things that tourists usually do-we were just sitting there. He walked in with a boom box-"old skool" style (no kidding) and said "Ya'll mind if I play some tunes for the ride?" to which we looked at each other and Mare responded, "Sure". We didn't know we would be listening to "dying fetus, obituary, and scorpian". After a few moments, we realized he would say what everyone else was thinking with no refrain. After a few minutes he realized there had been no proper introduction to which he said, "I'm John" that escaladed until we realized he was talking to us. We, however, did not respond with our names. He did not give us time before he said, "I have ADHD and I'm always happy." He proceeded to tell us about his extra curricular activities, inviting us to the skate park (to which he said, "That's okay if you don't, I've got plenty of people that will be there.") By this time I was shaking in my seat and trying not to breath. I could feel that laugh coming on-the one that is uncontrollable and loud-you all know that laugh. BUT-I kept it in. Until-we realized that we could not hear the conductor telling us which line we were on and what stop we were approaching. Before I completely thought that thought through, I heard, "WE CAN'T HEAR YOU, SPEAK UP ....." and I LOST IT. I just put my head down and he commented on how hard I was shaking. We had several other conversations with John and he included himself in about four other conversations with others before he jumped off at the skate park to join his "lots" of other people. The rest of our rides were not as eventful. Most of the people slept, read the paper, and minded their own business. We realized how much we missed our friend and his annoying/interesting lifestyle. One comment that really stuck with us was, "I am always happy. I could be ticked off and talking to someone and be grinning the whole time." How many times am I happy when on the inside I am really upset? I am ashamed to say that sometimes being upset affects my whole life-even people who are not directly involved with that particular situation. I pray about this often and lay at the feet of Jesus when situations like this arise.

We were unsuccessful at getting to the Consulate in time today. Transportation was hard and we ran into a lot of traffic that slowed us down on the way. We walked about 5 miles out of our way to the Consulate. We were about 45 minutes late and knew that there would be no getting in the door. We went anyway and sat on the steps(the picture!) of 3009 Whitehaven Street NW. This is the place that I have been calling for 5 months. It became all so real to me as I took off my flip flops and began to wonder what could happen tomorrow. After a few minutes, we realized that we could not sit there all night and the Brazilians might not like that. So, after much talk about the things we could see in DC-we ran off to find a bus. We chose an Ethiopian Cuisine restaurant which Mare said it was very true to actual Ethiopian food! The meat was in long strings? You ate with this like....bread stuff that you tear off, pick up the food, and then dip? Different. Very different.
Then, we decided to go Federal Triangle to see the Monuments in the dark. They were absolutely beautiful. I appreciate the fact that I live in America and have leisurely freedom to say the least.

Day 2

The Waiting Place...
...for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or waiting around for a Yes or a No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.

We woke up REALLY early in order to make our hour and a half long trek to the Consulate. Upon getting out of bed-I nearly fell into the floor. That is what wearing flip flops in DC does for you. My calves and feet simply could not work the way they should. We threw on some clothes and headed for Whitehaven Street NW
After the 45 minute Metro ride and hooving it about 10 blocks, we made it to the Consulate!!! (read "85" for the rest of this )

After the Consulate-we hopped a bus up to the National Cathedral as I called Brazil to let them know the results. Mr. Bose and I talked about what would happen next and not really understanding what was going on at the Consulate. We talked about some options and agreed to talk again once I had some more questions answered.
The National Cathedral is full of art, history, and beautiful architecture. The arches, stained glass windows, and mosaics are so intricately designed-it is hard to tear your eyes away from them. We had to carry on!! We had three days of sight seeing to do in just one! We ran off (well, actually we hobbled) to see the Holocaust Museum. I don't know if this piece of history can become a reality until you see this place. The smells, sounds, poems, photographs, artifacts, and exhibits bring this monstrosity to life. Sometimes you need to see, hear, and smell hard things.

The wild grasses rustle over Babi Yar.
The trees look ominous,like judges.
Here all things scream silently,
and, baring my head, slowly I feel myself
turning gray. And I myself am one massive,
soundless scream above the thousand thousand buried here.
-Yevgeny Yevtushenko (excerpt from Babi Yar)

We are the shoes, we are the last witnesses.We are shoes from grandchildren and grandfathersFrom Prague, Paris and Amsterdam, And because we are only made of fabric and leatherAnd not of blood and flesh, Each one of us avoided the hellfire
– Moshe Szulsztein, Yiddish Poet

My number is 174517; we have been baptized, we will carry the tattoo on our left arm until we die."
-Primo Levi, Survival in Auschwitz

We stopped on the Mall to recount what we saw, catch up on some reading, and watch some guys frisk others into playing whiffle ball with them while a friend video taped? Strange. Then, we headed up to "the Hill" to quickly see the Library of Congress and make our way to the Capitol Hill Baptist Church for Wednesday night service. This sign is what we found outside the church. We did not get to hear Mark Dever speak, but he has an outstanding Assistant Pastor who opened the Word and lead a discussion about Matthew 5:25-26. These verses talk about if you are going to court with an adversary, you should settle before you get there. This was quite interesting as the lawyers and other "legally" involved people from the Hill gave their insights and views on this passage. At the end of the hour, he gave us something to think about. He basically said, God is our adversary-we need to settle with Him before Judgement Day. I hadn't thought of these passages like that before.....

We had dinner with a friend and talked about his work on the Hill. He spoke of many neat opportunities and experiences! It was good to see a bit of familiarity within that big city!
We wanted to make use of every single moment-so we rushed off to sit on the Lincoln Memorial! The experience is breathtaking, serene, and the breeze seems to wrap itself around you. This is a great place to talk to God, think, and epitomize different things in your life. God has been speaking to me about several things in my life and through this experience confirmed some changes in my thoughts and actions.
So-you think the night is over? It isn't-we quickly got back to the Metro where we caught one of the last trains back to Franconia/Springfield. Life is just generally funnier when you are exhausted, in pain, and people watching. As we approached our final destination-we started counting the stops. The only problem is-is that we counted the "routine maintenance" stop and accidentally got off on the wrong one. It only took us five minutes to realize what we had done-to which we can do nothing but laugh. So-we wait fifteen extra minutes and catch the last train. This train carried a different group of dancers (ha ha) who thought it was funny to dance up and down the isles as the train was moving. I barely kept myself together. These are the Metro rides I LOVE. It's no fun when everyone minds their own business and follows all the rules!

You'll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You'll get mixed up
with many strange birds as you go.

So-in essence-I got to experience a little bit of everything along with the Consulate. The news was somewhat not what I was expecting. That's how God wanted it to be. So-I'm off to Great Places while I wait for His glorious and perfect timing in this situation. I am confident in His Sovereignty and ready to climb whatever mountain may come!!

you're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So...get on your way!
-Dr. Seuss Oh the Places You'll Go (all in green)

Submission

2008-04-13T11:16:00.000-07:00

In the book, Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood by John Piper and Wayne Grudem , the foreward is for singles. This is a bit encouraging as I continually answer the single questions of life for this part of my life.........

Jesus is the example to follow. He was single. He was born to serve.... He had deep friendships among all sorts of people-men, women, single, married. That was his work, an intimate part of his ultimate mission of dying on the cross for our sins... His relationship with Mary, Martha, Peter, and the other disciples helped prepare him for his death. No one can love in the abstract. he allowed hmself to be interrupted by needy children, distraught fathers, hungry men and sick women...Jesus sought to make himself vulnerable.
-Cheryl Forbes

I cared not how I lived, or what hardships I went through, so that I could but gain souls for Christ. While I was asleep I dreamed of these things, and when I awoke the first thing I thought of was this great work. All my desire was for the conversion of the heathen, and all my hope was in God.
-David Brainerd

She had been a missionary in China for six or seven years before she ever thought of wanting a husband. When a British couple came to work near hear, she began to watch the wonderful thing they had in marriage, and to desire it for herself. Being a woman of prayer she prayed-a straightforward request that God would call a man from England, send him straight out to China, and have him propose. She leaned toward me on the sofa on which we were sitting, her black eyes snapping, her boney little forefinger jabbing at my face. "Elisabeth, " she said, "I believe God answers prayer! He called him." Then, in a whisper of kenn intensity, "but he never came."
-Gladys Alyward conversation with Elisabeth Elliot

My whole being cries out continually for something I may not have. My whole life must be lived in the context of this never-ceasing tension. My professional life, my social life, my personal life, my Christian life-all are subject to its constant and powerful pull. As a Christian I have no choice but to obey God, cost what it may. I must trust him to make it possible for me to honor him in my singleness.
That this is possible, a mighty cloud of witnesses will join me to attest. Multitudes of single Christians in ever age and circumstance have proved God's sufficiency in this matter. He has promised to meet our needs and he honors his word. If we seek fulfillment in him, we shall find it. It may not be easy, but whoever said that Christian life was easy? The badge of Christ's discipleship was a cross.
Why must I live my life alone? I do not know. But Jesus Christ is Lord of my life. I believe in the sovereignty of God, and I accept my singleness from his hand. He could have ordered my life otherwise, but he has no chosen to do so. As his child, I must trust his love and wisdom.
-Margaret Clarkson on submission

I think submission to husbands/wives is over emphasized. It must be important to submit to my Lord first and foremost. How well do I do that? Do I submit to my Lord better than what I would a husband? How well do I carry out my submission to God? Is my submission fearless, relentless, diligent or just stagnant, unreliable, and unstable? I would say that it is both. I seek more of the former and less of the latter. I must admit that daily I struggle to kill the latter, but it is an uphill struggle. It is a fight of the flesh. Why wouldn't I submit? The one true peace, perfection, sacrifice, and so many other things.... It seems so easy s0-why isn't it? Submission= spending time with God daily, making outward to others what Christ has done inward, seeking out the sin problems in my life, giving Him my problems first, and seeing Him in every situation.
These are some verses I found that have encouraged me in this......

Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you.
-James 4:7

My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commandments with you, making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding; yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding, if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden trasures, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. For the Lord gives widsom from his mouth come knowledge and understanding; he stores up sound widsom for the upright; he is a shield to hose who walk in integrity, guarding the paths of justice and watching over the way of his saints.
-Proverbs 2:1-8

In him you also are being built together into a dwelling place for God by the Spirit.
-Ephesians 2:22

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. Let you reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which supasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
-Philippians 4:4-7

His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, by which he has granted to us his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire.
-2 Peter 1:3-4

Watching and waiting #EB912392547US

2008-02-23T17:20:00.000-08:00

I'm just watching and waiting.......literally. Sometimes it is like I'm spinning around and around into the unknown Bermuda triangle or something. My job as a dental assistant ended last week-so I've been debating on whether or not to go back to my substitute position in Madison County. I guess I should be spending some time in prayer about that. If I start back right now, I will not receive a check until May-so the benefits aren't really relative to me at this moment. I like doing odd jobs and babysitting!

My paperwork should all be in D.C. and my passport should be stamped and in the Express envelope # EB912392547US And yes-I do have that number memorized. I've been inputting that into the USPS site the minimum of 3 times a day. Sometimes it is very discouraging to repeatedly see the "No Record" tracking message. I just have to blow it off and continue on with the daily tasks and be thankful for the time God has given me in the United States.

I found out that one of my Cuban brothers, Mario(or Mayito pictured on your right), has made it to the States with his father! This is great news, I just hope that people are being kind to him and that he has found a "Little Havana" church to go to in Miami. He speaks no English except for "God Bless You" a phrase I heard him say every time he opened his mouth in Cuba. :)

Prayer Requests:

Mario and father
Visa Papers
BIS-new building, teachers, students, Daniel (visa guy)
Struggling friends and family members

Praises

Provisions in the much needed dental work I needed!!
Living arrangements
Continual patience

One of my greatest fears....

2008-01-10T18:37:00.000-08:00

was the dentist. As a child, I really hated going and having them scrape and vibrate my brain into a headache. I never liked the taste of the dust from my teeth as they were working.
Well, I'm working for a dentist until I leave (if it is within 6 weeks) as an assistant. I just imagine what the patients must be feeling. How can I make them more comfortable? What hurts? Why are they anxious?
Secretly-I really love this job. I mean, I really really like it. Who knew I would love loading silver into an "instrument" and doing things in a certain way--all the time.
I love listening to the elevator music and watching people being relieved from their physical and appearance pain. I love to watch their smiles creep up after they are shown their new teeth. I also really love talking to people and hearing where they work, what they do, and "rubber lip". Life is just precious and these people remind me of that with their attitudes, their conversations, and dedication to their dentist!
I hope to acheive this with my students.
There are many reasons that I'm learning this information. It's a job I didn't think I would ever do or a job that I would enjoy doing-but-I do. I am thankful for the opportunities God has given me. He provides in spectacular and miraculous ways-ways that I couldn't. I love that about Him. I've had lunch with my Dad TWO days in a row! I miss Richmond so so so bad, but this time is completely precious. I also love spending time with my Mom- :) We've been trying to get me together to leave, but it hasn't happened yet. We talk about going through the whole wall of teaching stuff to send to Brazil-but-we end up just hanging out :)
Tomorrow, I'm going to start tying up loose ends and taking care of the major stuff that needs to be taken care of here in the states!

Prayers and Praises

My teammate, Casey, got his visa after waiting for months and months. His patience has been SOOO encouraging!
Mary, my best friend, as she looks for the right opportunity for her life!
My new temporary job!
Brasilia International School as it opens back up for the semester and as my teammates travel back to Brazil.
For the students as they travel
For my family!!!! They are amazing!
For my future and current sponsors!! THANK YOU!!!
For AMAZING friends and their continuous love and joy they have been sharing with me! Our time has been SWEET!!!!

Thanksgiving at Christmas!

2007-12-31T09:41:00.000-08:00

I know we should celebrate Christ's birth at Christmas. I'm just so thankful that He came, lived, and then died for me-to save such a sinner as I. That overwhelming feeling always feels that way-overwhelming that someone would care so much for me.

Many of you might already know, but I have received my phone call from the Brazilian Consulate in Washington D.C. NOrmally these phone calls mean that you can be expecting your visa to be coming to you in a matter of several days or a week. With me, it's been a little different(kind of like the whole process) and with my visa only being at the consulate for about a month-it was a bit quick. We are all amazing that they have called for my passport already-as if it is going to be granted. My boss e-mail me to be honest with me about what they do and not know. He said that Brasilia has not contacted them about my paperwork being in Brasilia as of yet.-so it's a little odd that they have basically said that I am going to be getting my visa in january. So-we are not sure what is going on. I'm not questioning anything-I'm just giving God the glory for the experiences and even the hardships. I'm learning much about patience and how God works-if just a bit. I won't every fully understand but I can learn to deal with trials in ways that glorify God in every way!

Mary, my roommate came home from Peru two weeks and it is/has been very sweet to spend some time with her. Actually we have been connected at the hip and loved doing all of our old habitual activities together. Road trips, sports, great food, Fellowship, Bibile Studies, discussions, talking until we fall asleep,-just to name a few. I missed her and I know we will miss each other when things begin to change for us again. God only makes friends like this -friends that not only share your common interests but your spiritual and service interests as well! I thank God for her!

Prayer Requests

Continued prayer for the people handling my paperwork

for spiritual growth

for my teammates that are waiting or who are dealing with changing circumstances

for Brasilia INternational School-faculty, staff, and students as they are on holiday

for Daniel Lopes who works diligently to communicate with the Brazilian government on my behalf and the future BIS teachers as the visa process changes.

for the people who are giving me places to stay while I wait-Gail Wolford, John and Tammy Brockman, my grandparents, and my parents~!

for people who are supporting me-GOd is just sending them to me again and again! They come at just the time when I need encouragement!

as things come to a close here-that I will remember all of the loose ends that I need to tie up before I leave.

richmond meets manchester!

2007-12-09T23:35:00.000-08:00

CrossPoint Baptist met early on Saturday morning to serve God in Manchester. Richmond and Manchester? That's right, my CrossPoint family drove down to help out at the John Rice Center. The gains were A-Mazing! The Kendricks, Mr. Albert Spencer, Robbie Randall, and Joe Martin all did the "manly" jobs of laying trim, re-setting toilets, wiring and hanging lights. I stood in awe of the work being finished-task by task. The women buried themselves in clothes and took on the challenge of sorting, hanging, and laughing at some of the things found in boxes. (You can't tell me that underwear isn't funny and that very "Gamin" skirt I wore around-absolutely was funny) The students did an amazing job as we showed them what needed to be done. I thank God for such easy going girls that will do whatever needs to be done! Truly servants hearts were seen during this time.
The day came to a close and all of a sudden-I hear this buzzing around of a semi coming? What was this? Soon, a semi maneauvered into the loading dock and literally as soon as the door opened-the boxes began falling out. For two hours the workers unloaded these boxes labeled: womens, ladies, girls, boys, men's, infants, household, summer, and wemon's (we aren't sure what a wemon is...we're still looking for new owners of the contents...). These clothes were given out on Sunday to over 700 people in a matter of a couple of hours.
Serving God in this capacity is simply amazing. We had many opportunities to talk to the workers (mostly single mom's and children) along with the people coming in to receive something from the center. You can hear a constant-"How can I pray for you?", "Have you heard the gospel today?", "What do you think a person must to do get to heaven?".
I'm so thankful for the amazing church family that raised me and then for the church family who continues to nuture me in this stage of life. God is so good. He has given me much to do during this waiting period and I am thrilled at the chance to give back to the community that gave and has given much to me in the past and present. Also to be given the chance to serve with my current church family is priceless-their hearts are amazing.

God wrecked my life-it's the most beautiful wreck I've ever seen

2007-11-18T13:40:00.000-08:00

God is just giving me so many opportunities to serve Him. His glory and renowned are all I seek to glorify when I am speaking. Sometimes I don't even know what I'm saying. I have practiced a lot (thanks to all the traveling in the car by myself latetly). I spoke at Gray Fork Baptist Church in Manchester, KY this morning. Surrounded by the beautiful mountains and remnants of the fall foilage, this church encompasses the country culture. The warmth spread into my heart as members started filling this beautiful church. The light shown through the beautiful cross shaped windows. The blue stain glass created a serene illumination of the sky. The souls inside were kind and I could tell that most were hungry for the Word. The pastor, Mr. Boo Smith allowed me to speak and is interested in a partnership with international missions. This is an amazing opportunity for these people to get involved and see the hands and feet tha their money supports. I am very excited to see what God is doing for this little church. Boo spoke on how to be a Christian on Mission in the first with spiritual awakening. <><><

God's Closet

2007-11-10T14:16:00.000-08:00

Serving the poorest of the poor in Clay County taught me so many things. We are called to be humble and this is an experience that brings me to that level. At 6:30am (running on less than five hours sleep on a couch) we broke the dawn by running around getting coffee supplies and stirring with excitement for the people who would come today. As we clothed them in a brand new coat-we also gave them spiritual clothes. Upon leaving, they were ushered into a room and the gospel was shared with each person. Five people shared the gospel with 1, 034 people this morning. We are sure of 2 salvations and unsure of the hearts which were stirred as we planted the seeds. My job was to call numbers so that there would be no confusion and so it would be orderly. A group from Applachia Blankets came and helped us pull off this miraculous event. They wore beautiful smiles and bathed these people with the love of Christ. Their positive attitudes and cheer made this an even happier day for these people. They each got a brand new coat, a Bible, pack of socks, gloves, scarves, and bogans! God truly worked in lives and it is not over yet. We gave away every single brand new coat (down coats with fleece on the inside and a hood) and feel like there will be more people coming to see what we have on Monday. <><

I'm missing my parents already..and I'm not even gone....

2007-11-09T21:25:00.000-08:00

I've spent two amazing days with my parents. My Dad had the chance to show me some of his dreams becoming bigger and bigger. God is doing so much more than he could ever imagine through these missions he has helped establish in Clay County.
I've been trying to get CrossPoint Baptist (my church in Richmond) to come down and get involved with the center. Yesterday, I visited for the first time and it is simply amazing. I walked in and started breathing the brisk air as the back loading door was open. There were a couple of people volunteering. A guy that I went to high school with is a recovering addict and has committed most of (basically all) his time to this center. One day he stayed 11 hours to get clothes hung up, the floor swept, and the walls painted. Beautiful is the word I can use as I look upon his life and I realize how big God is and He can do whatever He wants in whoever He wants. He serves from early in the morning until he knows everything is just about done. My dad says that these are the people that call asking/begging for somethign to do. This center is helping him recover through keeping him busy on a volunter basis. His story is amazing.
I ran around and took pictures of everything-trying to capture some of the rigid and true to life details of the center. <><

That night we got ready and drove to Williamsburg, KY so dad could speak at a UNITE recruiting event. I never get tired of hearing about how God changed/is changing the lives of the people in Clay County. I'm so inspired by my father's diligence to God and to this cause. He wants better for the youth and the families in Clay County. His devotion is a testimony to his commitment to not only his church, but to God. After Williamsburg, we drove to Pikeville. This was the big event! We attended the UNITE Celebration in which Dad gave the Abner/Bolin Community Leader Award (yep! it's in his name!) and I learned about drugs and kids, challenges in communities, and about what is going on in other counties. I watched these people get awards that they were not expecting and kids receive awards for doing tremendous things in their schools. Truly inspiring!! Tomorrow-we will hand out BRAND NEW coats, scarves, gloves, socks, and Bibles!!!! I spent tonight cleaning bathrooms (!!!) and moving tables. I have a passion for these needs and for their souls. We have the chance to share Christ with all of them!!!! By the way-I got my papers from Brasilia!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This will take me into the last steps to getting there!!!! WHOOHOOO!!!

2007-10-18T20:01:00.000-07:00

So here is what I know out about my Kindergarten class in Brazil :)
My class consists of:
1 Syrian child (speaks Arabic at home), 3 Zambian (English at home), 1 Brazilian/American (English/Portuguese at home), 2 Spanish (Spanish at home...and their parents don't speak English), and 2 American kids (soon to be 3). I'm super duper excited about this and I cannot wait to meet these precious children!!! Everything is happening VERY quickly!!!!!
Thank you to all the people that have already committed to supporting me. I am amazed at your obedience. Your offerings are blessing my life as I learn that God will spur hearts with the want to give. Also, it will continue to bless others for years to come as I teach these children with and about the love of Christ. My prayer is that we will have spiritual conversations and that God will open their eyes and speak through me as I openly teach them the Bible intertwined with their content.

Thanksgivings:

Another family received their visas to go to Brazil!!!
For work and for experiences that are making me a better teacher!!
God is sending me messengers and encouragers at His perfect timing
For some great speakers in the past bit.
For helping me to realize that there is nothing good in me except for Christ

Prayer Requests:

The lady that is letting me live with her, Nancy, her daughter is going through her third round of chemotherapy. She has a strong faith and such a sweet family. God has given her the strength and drive to take chemo, care for a family, and still work full time. She is my new picture for perserverance.
Visa documents and continued patience for that part of the trip.
continued spiritual growth in faith, trust, and patience.
Lost and hurting friends and family members.
More work and side jobs.
Current and future financial supporters!!!!

About every other day-someone comes up to me and says, "Amanda, we want to sponsor you." or "Amanda, how can we help you?" A friend called me for a telephone number and in the middle of finding it she says-"Come over later, we're gonna help you go to Brazil" I could SHOUT when people do that. But-I don't think that anyone in the school would understand...so, I try to filter that through excitment mainly in words and a little in voice. My prayers are just being answered again and again and again. God is opening doors and placing opportunities in my path. Some of them-I gain spiritually(those are the hard ones) and others-they are monetary. I'm equally greatful for both for different reasons.

In His Grip

2007-10-11T12:35:00.000-07:00

...but as servants of God we commend ourselves in everyway: by great endurance,
in afflictions, hardships, calamities, beatings, imprisonments, riots, labors, sleepless nights,
hunger; by purity, knowledge, patience, kindness, the Holy Spirit, genuine love; by truthful speech, and the power of God; with the weapons of righteousness for the right hand and for the left; through honor and dishonor, through slander and praise. We are treated as impostors, and
yet are true; as unknown, and yet well known; as dying, and behold, we live; as punished and yet not killed as sorrowful yet always rejoicing as poor, yet making many rich; as having nothing, yet possessing everything.
-2Corinthians 6:4-10

Without His majestic grip-I could not make it day by day.
I look into faces and realize that those were once mine. I remember
the lifestyle of emptiness. I rejected God in every way presented.
God pursued me for 22 years before I finally let Him in.
I rejoice in the fact that even as I am responsible for
Jesus' death-I'm forgiven.

My friend, Julie Lasslo, always presents things to me in ways that are simple and
yet make me think. She and I were talking about a lot of things and "hating" sin came up.
Over the past couple of days-I have pondered this. I do hate sin. I especially hate my own sin-I just don't think I'd ever heard it like that before. Put into this perspective-I realized that hating sin is exactly what God wants us to do. We must do it. There's no mediocrity to sin. You love it
or You hate it. You serve the sin or you run away. You idolize it or you give it up.

1 Thessalonians 1:9
For they themselves report concerning us the kind of reception we had among you, and how you turned to God from idols to serve the living and true God, and to wait for his Son from heaven, whom he raised form the dead, Jesus who delivers us from the wrath to come.

Jesus, Lover of My Soul

2007-10-06T09:08:00.000-07:00

Jesus, lover of my soul, let me to Thy bosom fly,
While the nearer waters roll, while the tempest still is high.
Hide me, O my Savior, hide, till the storm of life is past;
Safe into the haven guide; O receive my soul at last.
Other refuge have I none, hangs my helpless soul on Thee;
Leave, ah! leave me not alone, still support and comfort me.
All my trust on Thee is stayed, all my help from Thee I bring;
Cover my defenseless head with the shadow of Thy wing.
Wilt Thou not regard my call? Wilt Thou not accept my prayer?
Lo! I sink, I faint, I fall - Lo! on Thee I cast my care;
Reach me out Thy gracious hand! While I of Thy strength receive,
Hoping against hope I stand, dying, and behold, I live.
Thou, O Christ, art all I want, more than all in Thee I find;
Raise the fallen, cheer the faint, heal the sick, and lead the blind.
Just and holy is Thy Name, I am all unrighteousness;
False and full of sin I am; Thou art full of truth and grace.
Plenteous grace with Thee is found, grace to cover all my sin;
Let the healing streams abound; make and keep me pure within.
Thou of life the fountain art, freely let me take of Thee;
Spring Thou up within my heart; rise to all eternity.

For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. So death is at work in us, but life in you.
2 Corinthians 4:11

Paul's body was marred so many times from the whips, beatings, and other physical inflictions. This did not stop him from being alive spiritually. Though my daily battles do not come by the way of physical beatings-they are anguishing just the same. A friend of mine was sharing with me about how Satan tries to use these weaknesses to get to us. We agreed that seeking God and clinging to Him allows God to use these trials to strengthen us. On the mission field, you fight loneliness, culture shock, misunderstanding of customs, and so many other things. You can cry out to God or allow these hard things to bring you down. It is only because of Christ that we have life.

God uses Paul to show me that a selfless life serving Him is really what I want. Serving others at any capacity is what He shows us. In James 1:27, James shares that, "Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this; to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world."
In 2 Corinthians, he also shows us that He, "through us spreads the fragrance of the knowledge of him everywhere. For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing..." everywhere echoes in my mind as I continue to wait patiently for the remainder of my Visa documents to come.

I became a bit frustrated during my prayers yesterday as I explained to God that I didn't know what was happening or if I had everything right on my documentation. I hadn't heard anything for about three weeks and it can become a bit hard to not hear anything. People say, "When do you leave?" and it's SO hard to just say, "I do not know." or "December something." It is difficult for people to realize that something is really happening if there is no date. But, I will not have a for sure date until two weeks before I leave. The Brazilian Consolate will make sure of this :)

In my thanksgivings-

God provided some support this week to help my airfare and travel Visa costs!!!
I received two very important pieces that will help complete my Visa packet!
I also received my health insurance cards! Yay! I will soon be able to get my allergy medication!!
Some of my teammates received their phone calls from the Brazilian Consolate and now have to send their passports to be stamped!!! They are really close!!!!

In my prayer requests-

continued prayers for patience, trust, and faith during the whole process.
teammates, faculty, and students of Brasilia International School.
current and future financial supporters!!
my mother to find another job and for her previous co-workers that are not saved.
other financial matters-selling my car, student loans

He Gives Beauty for Ashes

2007-10-01T06:16:00.000-07:00

Beauty for ashes,

Strength for fear,

Gladness for mourning,

Peace for despair.

These words and my Quiet Time remind me of the awesomeness of God.

As Paul said in 2 Corinthians-

3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.

It's hard to see this when we live in the United States of America-where we have everything. Our poor people don't have to be poor-we support them (not in all ways, but in a lot of ways that other countries do not provide). My friend, Mare, is working with people in Peru and identifying with these poorest of the poor. It's so hard for them to see Jesus because their circumstances are just horrific. I've seen this in the faces of people in Cuba. I love these people and want them to see Jesus. What can I say? What can I do? Walk among them and give them words that God would have me to say. "Comfort them with the comfort that which we ourselves are comforted by God." Let us not forget to feed them spiritually as well as physically. Reminding these people that our reward is not what we have here, but what we will receive in heaven. I have to remind myself of that all the time. Sometimes...it is just so hard to live here.

Prayer Requests:

Visa and related matters

Mare-friends on the street, comforting and sharing with them as God calls us to, future in mission work.

Brasilia International School-faculty and staff, new building, students.

Current and Future Supporters

Continued spiritual growth in patience, trust, and faith.

Praises

Supportive communication from housemates and the current Kindergarten teacher :)

Side jobs and extra work providing more income!

First speaking commitment-went very well! I was so nervous!

Opportunities to spend time with family and friends!

The Journey

2007-09-28T20:29:00.000-07:00

Psalm 67

May God be gracious to us and bless us and make his face to shine upon us,

Selah

that your way may be known on earth, your saving power among all nations.

Let the peoples praise you, O God; let all the peoples praise you!
Let the nations be glad and sing for joy, for you judge the peoples with equity and guide the nations upon earth.

Selah

Let the peoples praise you, O God; let all the peoples praise you!
The earth has yielded its increase; God, our God, shall bless us.

God shall bless us; let all the ends of the earth fear him!

Some of you may be wondering about this whole Brazil thing. I've heard, "You're not going.", "We can get you a job here.", "Can't you get a job around here?", "There's a lot of crime over there." and "We really didn't believe this was going to happen." Well, I'm glad that God is so much bigger than all of these comments.
One year ago, God really started working in my life. I am so passionate about teaching, missions, and people. I've been involved in local and national missions for three years. He began to tell me that this school year was going to be different. I didn't realize that He would call me internationally to Brasilia, Brazil! This is a dream that I've always thought impossible. With God, all things are possible!
As I served in Cuba-literally as the only American on the continent-I realized that I had such a heart for the nations and for students. Little to no contact with my family made me depend on God. Sometimes it was lonely, but those aren't the times that I remember. I remember the faces, eyes, and stories from each youth and their leaders. I loved serving God in this capacity. The view of international missions grew and grew. I began to explore options in serving overseas.
Serving in Brazil will be different. I realize that most countries are very different than Cuba. I also know that I will have many chances to impact students at the school and to work with other children in a seperate mission. As each mission differs, they each have one thing in common-glorifying Christ.
God is teaching me about patience, trust, and faith throughout this process. I pray daily for my team (in Brasilia), my students, the administration, and my local prayers and praises. I am so appreciative to the people that have been praying and to those who have committed to support me and give Christ to these students. That is my goal. To feed their minds and hearts with Christ. I thank God for the opportunity to be a vessel to Brazil. I know He does not need me, but He is allowing me to be used.

My prayer requests:

My teammates that are awaiting visa's and praise for those who have just received them.
The school, teachers, and students at Brasilia International School as they await the arrival of the teachers and pray for a new building.
My best friend, Mary, as she serves as a missionary in Peru
Praise for my supporters and prayer for future supporters.
Continued patience with God's perfect timing and with the whole process. The long waiting period is not here, yet. I am only performing small tasks every couple of days and getting them back a few days of each other. It is my hope that next week, all of these will become one document in which I will entrust to someone at the Brazilian Consolate in Washington, D.C. in which timing will be at their discretion. Again God's perfect timing!